My life.

I think i'm a nothing. An ugly disgusting loser. My brother and sister are much better than me at EVERYTHING. I am 15. My brother is 17. And my sister is 19. I have secret thoughts of murdering my sister. I want to f****** cut her head off ALL THE TIME!!! My brother gets all the girls. While i cant get one. I have longish brown curly hair and almost a full beard at my age. I walk around school getting nothing but ews and gross and all of that stuff. I've gotten insulted my entire life by my family and friends even my own parents. I've tried taking my life many times but something always comes in the way and stops me. I'm on serious depression medication but i feel that its not enough.

4 Comments

  • newest
  • oldest
  • most replies
  • most popular
  • If you're feeling depressed or suicidal what's important is that you talk to someone. There's lots of people who can help - if you're in the US try http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ (or call 1-800-273-8255), or in the UK there's the Samaritans at http://www.samaritans.org/ or Papyrus (which is a charity set up for young people) at http://www.papyrus-uk.org/more/hopelineuk, or childline at http://www.childline.org.uk. Some of them you can text or email if you'd rather not talk. There's also counsellors you could get in touch with through your school or doctors.

  • Yeah people call me freak,birch,loser,and others I only 11 and I am a super tom boy I keep mud and a small frog in my desk all the time once the frog jump out and on my tech I have big probems my friends ingore me so many times I am very suasival I almost hanged my self I guns around my house and sissoers in my bed my hair is all the way short I wear jeans and a black t all the time my teacher always like treats me horrible one almost punch me!!! I am really wanting to die bit I think about things and stop
    I'm a11 year old girl who is just I don't know

  • Im 16 and a female..
    I get ewwws and gross all the time, i know how you feel.
    My brother is a model and im the ugly one.
    It f****** sucks
    Hmu if you want to talk

  • This is a sad story. Not that you are a said person, but i feel bad for your pain... is there nothing in your life that you feel unique in? No habit or hobby that your brother or sister have no part in? If so, perhaps you should concentrate on that and how much you enjoy it, if you do. Finding your own way in life is important, who cares what your brother and sister are doing? You don't need to live up to their examples, they're just people, especially if they are as abusive as you say they are. If there is anything specific you do not like about yourself, perhaps you should take steps to change those things in efforts to make yourself feel better about yourself. I don't meant to say that you have to change who you are to be happy, i would never tell someone that if they are happy with who they are, but from the sounds of things perhaps you would benefit from maybe finding something new or different that is all your own, that your family can't touch, and make it yours and yours alone. It may help you to forget about what you feel about your siblings.
    Like i said, whatever they're doing should and does not need to have any kind of effect on you or how people see you, you are your own person with your own unique qualities, you simply need to embrace them. If your family and schoolmates are really as judgemental as you say, then i say they aren't worth your attention or concern. if you haven't got something nice to say, say nothing at all ; )
    On top of your medication, perhaps do some light exercise or make slight changes to your diet? Activity and nutrients affect hormone levels which may help to improve your mood. And once you stop letting things pile up on you, you may be able to see the sun through those clouds surrounding you ^^
    *MistaJ

Account Login
Signup
Is this post inapropriate?
Is this comment inapropriate?
Delete this post?