Holiday romance is back

Years ago I while single I had a holiday romance. We met on a few different occasions over the years. We have reconnected on Facebook, and have been chatting for over a year.

I admit that he is stirring something up inside me that hasn't been stirred in a while. He told me that he is falling for someone, and hopes to get the courage to tell her. He has recently been talking suggestive, and said he wants to kiss me again. Rekindle what we had.

I can honestly say that if it wasn't for the distance, I would have married this man. I was totally besotted by him, and him with me.

The night before I got married, I cried for the man I should have been marrying, and wanted to flee and find him.

I married out of convenience. Because I didn't want to be alone. Because I thought he would look after me. He has not done any of these things.

Do I follow my heart and go to my true love?

Aug 13, 2012

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  • Would it make a difference if I said I have been emotionally and verbally abused, and isolated? That my husband can't bare to put his arms around me and tell me that he loves me? That he has no sexual desire? He hasn't smiled or laughed in years. And if he cracks open a beer... I shake with what I am going to be in for??

    He has needs. He needs someone to sort his medication, was his clothes and cook for him...

  • That's not what was written in the original post. Not even sure that this comment is the OP or just another commenter. But if it is the OP, then leave him. You can do whatever you want, it's your life and your choice. You need to figure out what's best for you. But the grass isn't always're still depending on some other guy to rescue you. If you want to leave, then do it for you..not because you think that someone is waiting in the wings. What makes you think you wouldn't be washing clothes and cooking for this other guy?

  • You're one of those people who jump from relationship to relationship because you think that some other person will make you happy. But you get into another relationship only to find that something is amiss. You look outside to fill the void of what's missing on the inside. You are responsible for your own happiness. If you're not happy, no one is going to make you happy. They can only enhance you and your life. You need to deal with what is missing otherwise you will spend the rest of your life searching. If you're not happy with your marriage, then leave. Otherwise, stop cheating (emotionally) on your husband and make it work and work on yourself.

  • LEt me be brutally harsh, you married a man you didn't love because YOU didn't want to be alone and you wanted him to look after you.

    Your reasons for marrying were all about what you wanted, not what is required to make a marriage work. Yet, somehow it's HIS fault - even though you married him knowing it was a lie.

    Considering you got married because of what you wanted, why stop now?

    I told my wife after we got married that if she ever cheated or wanted to leave she should just do it - because for me to find out later that I wasted my life trying to satisfy her lie is just about the worst thing she could do to me. Staying with a spouse you don't love and you're cheating on steals from your spouse their chance at a different future.

    So, if you want to follow your heart you should do it. Afterall, thus far it's been all about what you wanted anyway so why try and pretend otherwise.

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