I will always remember where I was when
I will always remember where I was when I won 24.9 million dollars. It was significant to me because in September, I had printed out a check from 'The Secret' website and I had made it out to myself for 25 MILLION DOLLARS. I taped it on the wall in front of my desk with my other affirmations and looked at it's amount every single day. It didn't matter how it came- I just KNEW it was coming. That it had already been laid out for me. I looked at my other affirmation- a collage of THINGS I wanted to see in my life- cars, houses, furniture, health insurance- all of it. I even had pictures of lotto tickets on it. I would look at those things, know they were implanting in my brain somewhere and try to forget about it so my subconscious could forge a way for it to happen. I even took a story out of the newspaper about a woman who had won a lotto jackpot and replaced her name with mine. I carried the article in my pocket with a check for 10 million dollars 'from the State Lottery Commission'. lol
At that point I was tired of working, kind of sad and trying to fight my way through a period of transition. I knew I was having one and I had just gone through a GIANT moment of satori or zen. So I KNEW something was going to happen I was just weary about when. Try as I may I was excited in a way because I was like a tired kid fighting sleep. I knew something was coming. I didn't know when and I didn't want to miss it. I knew I had put my intentions and desires out there. So it was a matter of time before the universe answered. And I was ready for it to answer. In fact I was almost to that point where I was getting belligerent about it because I was so weary of waiting for it. Like a lack of sleep. But I wanted to not do that so I kept feeding positive affirmations even if I did not feel like it. I noticed a lot of synchronicities that day as well. For one, I read the account of Chief Seattle's speech twice that day. I saw it online at my blog site and I saw it in my Real Magick book by Wayne Dyer. I knew it was not a coincidence. It had significance. I had asked earlier for a sign that any of this was real because it's hard to keep perspective on any of this.
I bought my quick pick megamillion tickets and went about my life that day, finishing articles and answering emails and starting new projects and finishing them. I went to bed that night like usual. When I woke up the next morning I was all abuzz. I woke up at 4 am before the buzzer went off on the alarm. I jogged with great freedom and intensity. I was lighter than air because I had removed all my burdens. I KNEW. I had put my intention out to be a 32 year old multimillionaire and, KNOWING that the universe is obedient and never says no- and would come through for me and never let me down- I checked my numbers and found I had won the 24.9 million dollar megamillions jackpot. I had looked at the 24.9 million and said to myself- 'That's the number." referring to my check on the wall from The Secret. I had seen myself coming to my landlord's wife that I wanted to buy the house and handing her a cashier's check for $125,000. I saw me telling my mom about winning money and paying her back. I saw this as the next life and learning experience I had been asking for. I saw it as the alignment I felt and knew the time was right for what I had intended. I felt ALIVE.
AND IT CAME TRUE. I had external wealth in the HERE and NOW.
I didn't know how to feel at first but when feeling did come, I let myself be lost in it. There were howls and there was some tears too. Man, it was amazing. I thanked my kids for hanging in there with me because I knew it had been rough on them but we came through it! And I told them to always remember to hang in there no matter how much something sucks- if you hold on to your vision- it's THERE.
So... after a long journey, I wanted to know if I was truly the prime source creator of my existence and all I could see...turns out I was.