What have I done?
I had an affair with a man who I know from work. It wasn't innocent and I knew it was wrong at the time. It was just such a feeling to be desired by someone after years of being taken for granted by my husband. That and after two kids I was having self esteem body issues and was becoming depressed by it all.
It was pretty torrid between the two of us. During lunch breaks, right after work, early mornings for two months. Mostly at his home but also in public places. I did things I would never do or have done with my husband even before we were married. I knew it was wrong and so I went to break it off with him.
He told me I couldn't stop seeing him. That if I did my husband might find out. He also said he had used his spy cam to record us at his place a few times. I was stunned and felt like I was going to vomit. He told me he expected me to be at his place after work that day.
Foolishly, I went ahead and met him at his place again that day. This time it was for oral s** only and he openly took photos of me doing it which makes me believe he didn't record it previously but now I was really trapped because I know he has photos.
Since January I have been back three more times at his demand and the last time he had a friend of his there as well. And yes, it was what you are thinking.
I don't know what to do. I can't have my husband find out, it would ruin our marriage and I can't lose my kids but I can't just keep doing this and things are now way out of control.