Jealous and full of contempt
TLet me first say that me and my brother (I am his sister in case you'rewondering) have always been close. Keep your minds out of the gutters because I mean we have a brother-sister bond like no other. I am quiet and shy in school and only have a few friends so me and my brother do hang out a lot.
Now here's my issue. I can't help it. We live with our dad and he got together with a woman who has a son that is in my brother's grade and stuff. And I can't help the contempt and jealousy I feel. Anything me and my brother do he has to come and spoil it. When we do hang out together with the new boy, we don't act as we usually do. And most of the time, the boy will steal my brother away to go do something they both know I have no interest in, like airsoft. And I hate it. I want to cry but cannot. Also, the boy stinks. He never bathes or uses deoderant. My brother and I would be playing on our xbox one and I would smell the boy before I see him. He'll ask my brother, "Hey, how about we go train for airsoft?" And I will just be sitting there, full of hate.
Another thing. This boy used to bully my brother. And I find it so hars to forgive and forget that although I try. And my brother is so good hearted. He cannot say no. So he just goes along with whatever the boy asks him to do. Like one day they were airsoft training and he had my brother crawling in gravel. I casually said, "Brother (I said his name really) why not crawl in the grass?" And the little punk looked over and said, "I'm trying to make him tougher. I'm the CO of this team, quit trying to run it." I could have strangled him then and there. Me and my uncle both try to take up for my brother so that he isn't always doing stuff he doesn't want to do.
The boy's mother never gets on to him or anything. I am so sick of it. Maybe I am being jealous and irrational. I don't know. But what I do know is that I'm going to quit faking a smile one day and just blow up on everyone. The boy's mother is okay with getting onto my brother but never her son. No, no, to her he is an angel.