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Sinking
My wife left me and I cant get over it. while I was with her I thought about being with other women but tried to fight it off and be a good husband. when I saw it was falling apart I got desperate because we stopped having ** and did sexual things with men because for some reason there are always men willing to do that, I still do it, im disgusted with myself because of it, since we split up iv had ** with a woman I don't find very attractive but still talk to because I don't know when ill find another person who will like me. im stringing her along and hate that I do it. I keep ** over my friends when I have no intention to, I say something or do something that I don't think is wrong till after I do it. I keep making mistakes and it makes me question everything I do. im writing this now because I im sinking into a dark place and I don't want to go any lower. i want to be a good person, i want to be happy, but when ever i try to make things right and stop doing these things something happens and it gets worse, and i sink back down.
Real sorry to hear. Good luck
You need to accept and respect your wife's decision and move on. Go and talk to a therapist because it sounds like you need to talk with someone and sort things out. You need a go at life on your own for a bit. No relationships, you're not ready for one until you deal with the loss of your marriage. And deal with who you want to be and who you want in your life. You can be a good person, you're just doing things that you're not all on board for. Look, if you're bi or gay that's fine, just be safe. If you don't really like that woman, let her go. Be upfront and honest with your friends. If you need help, let them in. Stop sabotaging yourself. In dealing with people and friends, have integrity behind your words and your actions. You'll be okay, you're just going through a tough time and you need to allow that it's going to take time to heal. So instead of doing self-destructive things..start taking care of yourself. One day at a time.