Rest in peace Pam G.
You lost everything. Your husband, your children and your dignity. You lost your mother and then you almost had nothing else to lose. Then you died.
You were a middle aged unattractive woman that was desperate for a husband to support you. You yourself had no job skills and your health was poor.
I didn't want to be your boyfriend. You were not pretty and you had nothing to offer. I pitied you though and you mistook that compassion for love.
I did not love you.
When I heard that you had died suddenly I had mixed feelings. You were not yet fifty when that happened. You died sleeping on the couch of a man old enough to be your father but at least you died in your sleep. You did not suffer physically.
I was sorry when your mother died of cancer and left you with nothing. I was sorry when your children left you to live with their father. I was sorry when you remarried the wrong man and you lost your alimony and later on child support money. I was sorry when you had to go to the hospital and you had no money.
If you had not died what would have happened to you? No job skills, no support, nothing. You would not have lasted five minutes on the street.
You have my pity but not my love.
Rest in peace.