Existence,Dark and Light, WHY

I did not know how to say it and yet I do, my mind is broken and so is my hart. So many questions and yet no one who will understand. If God made us and this world so perfect than why do I feel like I dont belong , why do I even try when I hate it all. This world, the people. The human being has the ability to create wonderes things and is able to imagine so much more yet its all just a lie . This thing called love why to me its just a word . I've never felt something as love . Is being alone in this world that I hate so much my destiny. Then theres the struggle between darkness and the light yet the darkness is the only thing that brings me pleasure. I feel so so lost. Im lost yet wise. All these questions and no answer or someone to answer them . Insanity thats all I have.

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