Married but in love with my best friend
I've been married for 10 years with 2 little ones with someone I very much love but am not compatible with and is bad for me. He's cheated, lied, stole, gambled, drank and hit me. Since before I met him I've been in love with my best friend. We've never done or said anything outside of a healthy, respectful friendship. I never took a chance with him because I don't want to loose him as a friend. Although sometimes I hate my life with my husband, I still love my husband. Sometimes I think my best friend might feel the same, loving me in secret and not wanting to jeopardize anything. He's offered to take care of me and the kids the last time I almost left my husband, told me that I am his soul mate (but made it come off in a friends sort of way), we almost married in college for him to get more military benefits, and ONCE he kissed my neck while drunk before I was married but I was dating someone and I stood my ground not wanting to be a cheater which he respected. I keep thinking about that night about how my life could've been if I would've just gone with it. I love my husband but I wish he would leave me and I could go running to my best friend. I wonder if I'll be old when my husband dies and I'll finally get the chance to be with my best friend.