I am obcessed with sexing most men I meet
I am 38 yo beautiful white woman, educated and crave new d***. I have been married twice, have two wonderful children and have f***** over a man I have known for 9 years. He has paid my bills, repairs to my home, gave me spending money and paid my house off, as well as helped me through school. He knows I s** other men. Last summer (2014) I called and said I needed help and he responded as always. after not seeing or talking to him in six months. I recently did the same thing and dropped him again as soon as I got a menial job and thought I could make it without him.
My problem: I still need his help but am afraid he has given up on me. I think he is f****** a friend of hours or maybe I'm wrong. Anyway I have made money....in bed... to make my bills, I drink to put up with all this and he has been my alcohol supplier but he has not called or texted. I've always been able to control him by giving him hints but never any complete story. maintaining power over him. Recently he refused an offer of s** from a young lady and said he'd wait for me. He's always kept parts of his life , not private, but unanswered and at times I distrust him. Maybe as an excuse not to love him though he loves me. As in the past, since he left I have been f****** two different men. Trust between us is gone and I want to f*** his brains out some more. As intelligent as he is it may take a lot of f****** but I want to.
What do I do, please?