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Ln love with a boy outside marriage
Hi, im a 37 years old married woman with two sons. married life is not great but im managing.my husband is very good person who remains always busy in his work and most of the days remains out of station. i am highly energetic active and ambitious. to engage myself i did my higher education and got my doctorate and am working as a professor in a college. everyone in my family friends and at workplace have lots of respect and are very proud of me. Ive so many credits to my side and have a high value system and i stand by it.so my life was good though not great.family job friends and all. before six months an old student (12 years younger to me) texted me in facebook and i was replying him as a student. then we got along well and became good friends. he is a very good boy. but after some days he told me that he was having a crush on me from his college days. i didnt take it seriously and then again we were chatting daily and there was a bonding between us.i started to enjoy his company and was emotionally attached to him.we chatted day and night when he said that he was in love with me.i too was convinced got carried away with the new feeling and felt love for him. though i never saw him in person.he says that love has no age and blah blah..i was really feeling love for him.he is such a good boy and is committed that he does not think of anyone else. bt i keep saying that such a feeling for a married woman is wrong. for which he says that we are not going to get married, nor am i asking you to leave your family or spouse, nor we are physically involved. this is love and love is eternal. i vl be there for you for life time. i will get married and have a family but i will always love you.i liked it. but his thoughts were constantly engaging me. i was always thinking of him. so i took a decision and asked him not to text me again and leave from my life. i know he will be shattered and me too. he didnt text me after that. i keep on thinking about him coz i know that he will be in pain.now i want some suggestions so that i can come over everything and stop thinking about him. im engaging myself in different activities and im busy. but his thoughts are constantly haunting me!i love the feeling of being in love and know that this boy is also true. i did this bcoz..though i feel love for him i know that its not right. The thing is that i also love him a lot. should i ask him to come back and continue this friendship with him sharing love towards him secretly or should i let him go.he lives in another country at present and there are rare chances of me meeting him. he says that he will come to meet me one day even if i get old.
can u ppl pls help me to come out of all this. thank you.
Secretly my wife a teacher had same thing happen to her she was drunk one night in bar and he was there and she ** him most of night. he use to sit in front row with a ** in school and she of course wondered if it was that large size and it was. When done she told him it never could happen again and that was it. Now about 6 years later a picture came in our email showing his **. She recognized it when he said Mrs ... remember this and she told me what happened.
Was your doctoral program in a language other than English?
You have very ** English for a college professor, very **. Difficult to believe you are teaching anyone, are you telling porkies?
Okay...that was about my language...what about the situation? Don't you have any suggestion?
Thank god you cut that off! You have 2 kids and a good husband; I noticed the other guy said we will never get married! Real love does what is right for someone's children & conscience! A lot of people and things are best left in the past - stay the course you won't regret it!
Thank you so much for your support..dear friend.
V al hv r own fantasy world n luv r own fantasies! But, reality **!
Lets go back in past a little..U hv not mentioned anything abt ur younger days..college days. Did u evr fall in luv in thos days?
May b ur hrt is looking to fill up that gap..u wanna relive to fall in luv, to hv that only 1 person who says to u that u belong..
U want to stay in luv coz its a gud feeling, makes u do things positively, helps u live better in the daily rut of life..
U cant let this feeling go evn if u want to...evn if u try to. Many years down the line, u will agn get busy, very busy..but u wont forget.
It's difficult, but time is the best healer. It jus helps us to live with the pain. Dont worry, jus look at ur reality world, ur 2 sons.. U head will mov on, although hrt wont. Ur body will grow old, although luv wont.
All the best, do the best, n forget the rest!
N if he does come to meet u 1 day, u will definitely know ur own answer!
You did the right thing. Definitely not the easy thing, but absolutely the right thing. You felt what you felt about the young man (he's not a boy) because the relationship was a pure fantasy. It had no down side because it couldn't: you had all the rewards and none of the risks, all the benefits without any of the costs. The relationship never entered the realm of reality so there was no risk associated with it. Neither of you ever experienced the frustrations and frictions of real relationships while you were "together" -- the frustrations and frictions you experience in marriage -- so it seemed perfect and without any negatives. Eventually, you'll come to accept that what you felt for him wasn't actually love, because it all existed in the alternate universe of unreality, and you'll see that love is what you feel for someone despite the challenges of day-to-day life and work-a-day living. And eventually, you won't think of him as often, and you won't think of him as "what might have been", because it never could have been that.