50 Shades of Gay- Part 1

I will not attempt to do an E.L James but trust me, my attention to detail could put her to shame. It was an awakening or a moment of truth of sorts. I'm engaged to a lovely woman who's perfect for me and we love each other deeply. Due to my education, I get to see my fiancé only for a few days every few months and normally the s** is great even though there have been times when I think I had p*** induced 'stability issues'. So the last time around this happened, I decided that the best thing for me would be to wane myself off p*** and become more 'human' so to speak.
So what used to turn me on? My fiancé and p***. Mature women (you're 58? May I stick my tongue up your ass?) And wait for it!- gay p***. The kind where the old hairy bulging bellied middle aged men pound the smooth, round, girly bottoms of teens and young boys. The kind where the younger bottom (as they are called) moan, wince and gasp when they are dominated. The kind where the bears would thrust their big thick penises into the waiting mouths of the young only to be slurped to glory and then later, have them spread their legs and gently enter their pink, tight anuses with their bulging bellies or their sloppy b**** slapping against the young butts.
The kind of stuff I'd never really do but always enjoyed watching and jerking off to though in all frankness and fairness I'll admit that I've long wondered what it felt like to be dominated and have your a*** filled with another man's thick p****. In particular, a fantasy I jerked off to was the thought of a threesome with my friend's parents where a younger me is f***** in the ass by the 60 year old dad of his while I would be eating his mother out. I therefore considered myself bi-curious but straight leaning (I would think she tasted yummy).
When I did decide to begin my no p***, masturbation & o***** challenge (as it's called PMO), I had no doubts I would succeed in detoxing myself. A week passed by and then one more, things were going solid. I did have erections but largely I thought the situation was well in control. But after that things began to change. The suppression had started to play tricks with my mind. I would find falling asleep harder, being restless and often on the edge. Slowly my straight erotic thoughts took a turn for worse and the gay thoughts began taking hold and take hold, they did very swiftly.
In one very wanton google searching session, I stumbled across some adult personals where men solicited the company of other men. A lot of them were routine commercial in nature where they offer any man of any religion, cut or uncut c****, top or bottom, body to body massages and more. And then there were some where a bi sexual man had posted the picture of his back seeking another bi sexual. And then there were many other ads where a subservient young partner would offer his mouth and his a*** to service a worthy c***. And one where a middle aged bottom invited dates from well behaved, clean and hygienic men to date and bed. Tried responding to a couple of such ads to see what it is like but that didn't go very far. The damage was already done and a seed was firmly planted in my mind.
A night passed by and I was still fighting hard to do away with wet gay dreams but I wasn't making much progress. In a moment of particular weakness, I ended up posting an ad which invited well behaved, healthy men of all ages to take me out on a dinner date, treat me like a lady and get lucky with my virgin bottom. One male responded quite quickly asking me for pictures and other details of my body which I was only more than glad to share. I must admit that I felt like a woman trying to get laid. Soon after sharing my pics, I could no longer hold my excitement and I had to m********* and release my load. And then my head cleared. I immediately went online, deleted the ad and the profile and went to bed being thankful that I didn't actually do anything stupid.
A day or two passed without incident and I was feeling good about myself albeit a little foolish for the wrong turns I took. A couple of days later, it came back in full force again. This time around, I ended up downloading Grindr- a gay chatting and meeting app. I used the app to chat and seek mature (40+) men and found 1-2 of them in the nearby cities but nothing much happened beyond a chat. I didn't sleep that night out of pure excitement. Thoughts of how an older mature man would gently enter my tight girly a*** excited me to no end and shocked me simultaneously. Oh and in my defence, I also installed Tinder to see if I can get some elder women to bed.

To be continued...

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