Cheating for the first time
So my gf and I have been together a yr and a half. I have been in longer relationships but have never loved anyone like I love my current gf. This story all started when she went on a 7 day backpacking trip with a group of people she is going to go to school with. On her return home she told me there was this attractive guy and they started flirting pretty heavily. One night they had a discussion and they decided not to go any further because they both had significant others. They sealed this pack with a kiss on the cheek. When she told me this I felt that she had cheated on me. There have been other cases where she has done similar things. I was p***** and 3 days later I was at a club. This girl gave me her number and after getting to know each other we found out she lives like 10 mins away from me. So yes that night I did go over to her house. I did have s** with her. I am one of those people who gets off on cheating confessions and have thought my whole life it would be hot to cheat myself. I was wrong. The s** was terrible. I felt terrible afterwards and even during bc my d*** went soft. The next day I told my gf what I had done and I feel like the worst person ever. Instead of yelling at me and breaking up with me my gf thinks she shares some blame in what I did. She has said she doesn't want me to be hurting and things of this nature. Since I have told her literally 50 percent of my time has been spent crying. I don't want to lose her but yet know I don't deserve to have her. She is the best gf in the world and an even greater person. The moral of the story is don't cheat. It's never worth it and the guilt eats you alive.