I kissed my best friend and my boyfriend doesn't know
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 2 years now.. and he has a very suspicious and jealous nature. Even if I look at a random guy, he gets mad at me in an instant.
Anyway I know my best friend for almost a year and he knows my boyfriend well. So he also knows that my boyfriend has bad temper and controls me too much.
What happened was, I was sitting with my best friend at night, just talking and letting frustrations out. We do that often, sitting and having beers at night and talking. BUT I never told my boyfriend because I was scared he will just get really really mad at me. He shouts at me sometimes and that f****** hurts. So just to avoid all that, I don't tell my boyfriend that I sit and drink beers with my best friend.
There was one night where I just got so done with all the B***sh** and had a little too much to drink. And next thing I knew I was sitting on my best friends lap and kissing him. I was not fully drunk. I knew I should stop but I kept going because it felt so right. He is always there for me, always supporting me and lifting me up, I have so much respect for him in my heart.
I'm not sure how to tell my boyfriend all this happened or even tell him anything at all... I am so confused. Because I know no matter how controlling my boyfriend is or how much he controls me, nobody deserves this kind of betrayal.
I am feeling so guilty right now. I don't know how to deal with any of this. Help :(