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Gay but...
I'm gay but I'm in a straight marriage. I feel I'm just going through the motions of life. Not really happy nor depressed. I mean I love her but it's more like a friendship than a marriage.
I'm in the same situation. Married and two full grown kids. Haven't had a gay experience in 20 years and miss it.
There is no good reason that you can't have both, or can't do both. Keep your marriage, but play on the side like a hung **!!!
Definitely have an open conversation with your wife, about your feelings. If you aren't ready to confess your feelings regarding your sexuality, perhaps don't mention that part of your feelings with your wife, but definitely let her know about everything else. You deserve happiness and so does your wife. Good luck
A very open and honest conversation about what that means to you and your marriage needs to take place. You never know how your situation could turn out. It could be incredibly amicable. But it seems like you're both cheating each other of really being happy. You can't truly be who you are in a marriage with a woman. And she can't be who she is being married to a gay man. Does she know or have an idea that you may be gay? Sometimes it's not as surprising as you think. Maybe talking with a therapist can help you navigate how to talk with her about this...