Becoming a ravenous desire
My stepdaughter is 14, and has grown into not only an extremely beautiful, but also a sensual young woman. Her curves are amazing. I also know that she has a very dirty mind, as I've heard her make sexual comments since she was 11. She also dresses to reveal as much as she can. Through her perfectly form fitting clothing, I've learned the perfect forming of her b******, her ass and her p**** lips.
My desire to taste her has grown. Grown to where sometimes I will m********* into her used panties. The thrill of having her p**** juices in any form rubbing against my c*** is intoxicating. My biggest fantasy is sticking my hands under each of her ass cheeks, lifting her small wet p**** to my mouth, and going down on her until she orgasmed multiple times.
I've neither said nor done anything to even give the slightest hint that these desires have been steadily growing within me for most of the last year. I've always done my best to be a kind supportive father to her.
There is a part of me that cannot help but wonder what she thinks of me, in that she always covers up, and makes sure that nothing on her is slightly visible when I'm in the room. I'm hoping that it's nothing more than being aware of appropriate modesty. Yet part of me worries that she senses my attraction, and makes sure to not feed it.
Either way, I hate myself that part of the human desire is to act and partake of her body until I am filled. Yet I also know that there is 100 times more that I stand to lose were I to do so. My marriage, my family, my standing in my church, my self respect, and not to mention the legal aspect of the problem.
I'm not afraid that I'm going to act on them. She is in no danger. She is in the next room right now, and I'm wanting nothing less than to go in there, pull off her pants and panties, place my head between her knees, and taste of her sweet nectar for a long while.
AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT!!!
A man of integrity should not feel this way about his wife's child. I'm not going to do anything. I value her too much to do her harm. I just hate that I'm having this mental struggle and that there is no one whom I can talk to about it, without them thinking I'm not only barking mad, but also a sadistic pedophile that needs to be locked up.
If nothing else, thank you for reading. I just needed to get this out.