I'm so messed up
I don't know why, but all my life the only women who have been interested in me are women who are already in relationships and are looking to cheat. I have never had any luck with single ladies. I feel like women aren't interested in having any kind of meaningful relationship with me, they don't want to be seen in public with me, they only want secret trysts and leave it at that. They don't see me as husband or boyfriend material, just someone to f*** around with. I would consider myself a nice guy and I'm totally confused why women treat me this way. There are a number of single women whom have never shown interest in me; That is, until they get into a relationship with another man. Then they do a 180 and come onto me like crazy, and I'm ashamed to admit, I have not been strong enough to resist them all.
Although some of my friends think I'm lucky, I think it's more of a curse than anything. I'm getting older now and looking to settle down but I'm looking for a sweet wholesome woman. I have absolutely no luck with that and I don't know what to do anymore. Perhaps evolution (or God) has designed me to be a sperm donor, not a husband and father of legitimate children. This idea terrifies me, as I'm afraid without a family and kids of my own, what happens to me when I get old?
I have sinned much. Perhaps I don't deserve a family. But it was never my intention to end up this way. I never wanted or manipulated women to treat me in this manner. I only played my cards as life dealt them to me, in the best way that I could. I am sorry for all the pain I've caused.
Thanks for listening to my rantings,
Have a good day