Account Login
Regrettable lockdown ** with brother
I am so glad I have found this site, as I feel like I have to tell someone what happened, but I dare not speak of it.
My name is Poppy, I am 19 and until they sent us all home I was at university. My brother 22, got furloughed, couldn't pay rent and so was also back at our parents house. It was like being 15 again, living at home, but not able to go out.
We live in an old farm house and because of its age I have to go through my brother's room to mine, and the other way to the bathroom etc, there is no privacy.
One night after our parents had gone to bed, I passed through my brother's room and he was awake, we started chatting, and I sat on his bed.
Conversation ran to relationships and then to **, we had both left kinda relationships behind. We joked about lack of **, and then lack of privacy, which turned in to inability to **. Obviously he had not been able to incase I came in. I suggested we should just agree a time that was ** time and we shouldn't disturb each other. Next morning after the first time, he asked me if I had, and I nodded, I asked if he did and he nodded too. We had a system!
A couple of nights on, and when the question came up again, I asked, he nodded, and then said I know you did. I asked how and he said he could hear me, then he joked that it had helped him, I called him a pervert and gave him a shove. Next night, it was that time, he said to me, you can leave the door open if you like, I was quite shocked. I asked if he meant to listen or watch, to which he replied whichever is on offer. I was like OMG we may as well be doing it together. I was joking, but he said I'm up for that.
I walked in to my room and left the door open, I got in to bed and slipped my hand in to my PJs, seconds later he appeared at the door. I shut my eyes and carried on. Then I hear his voice right next to me, asking, can I get in bed. I nodded and in he got. He was dressed but clearly hard. I could hear him removing clothes and then he started. I pulled the sheets down telling him I did not want ** on the bed. This exposed his ** and I couldn't look away. My wrist was getting tired, fighting the elastic of my PJs waistband, so I pulled them down exposing myself, much to my brother's delight.
He asked if he could have a go as he put it, and as I seem to ** best when I am relaxed and I felt on edge I thought it would help both of us.
I closed my eyes and it felt great to be touched, but the feeling faded. In my head all I could think was this is nearly as bad as **, so my next thought was, ** it.
I pulled his hand away and got on all fours with my PJs and underwear by my knees and said, get on with it before I change my mind. He checked I was on the pill and then knelt up behind me and entered me.
Straight away that felt better, that was the feeling I had missed, feeling filled with hot **.
Instantly I felt the feeling build and then spill out in to **, it was all very quick. I think the sound and feeling of me ** made my brother ** too, barely was my ** fading when I felt this hot rush inside me. The whole thing lasted about 30 seconds, the actual ** part.
He got tissues for both of us, he wiped his ** and I wiped up his ** as is ran out of me, we really didn't want ** on our parents sheets, how would we explain it. We were totally fine afterwards and spooned in bed together till we fell asleep. When I woke up he was gone and I was left with regret at what I had done, and how it had happened.
As you might has guessed by now you are conversing with someone who has a few years under his belt. And I have had my own issues in the past. Being that you told me yours I will tell you mine. I was around the age of 15, right in the middle of going through puberty when I discovered that my older sister used to take showers with the bathroom window open, and that my bedroom window had a great view of these events. I was very excited cause I got to see a girl naked, right in front of me... I was grossed out because it was my sister, but very excited at the same time. Decades went by and I never talked about it because society told me it was simply wrong. Well, I ended up finding out that it was pretty normal for a kid to spy on their sibling, it is part of the growing up process. But more to the point I discovered that our bodies are like machines that doesn't always operate like our brains would like it too. Your body, when aroused by another person's body, does not ask the question, 'Is this my brother?' To your body, another human body is just that, another human body, and it is programmed to respond a certain way. It is very difficult to override that programming. On the plus side, you seem to be finding the positives out of what happened. You found it exciting, and deep down enjoyable, and there is nothing wrong with that, for as I said before you both are consenting adults. But I will tell you the other reason why you liked it... Because you brain told you that it was wrong and that alone made the whole thing exciting. That's what kept me spying on my sister, I knew it was wrong, but it was that excitement that kept me coming back. Now here is the big question, Do you think that it will happen again?
Thank you for sharing your storey too, but I feel your storey is about going through puberty, we are both adults and had relationships etc. This didn't happen because my brother is the only boy I could see and my body is full of raging teenage hormones. Technically I have a boyfriend, albeit casual, so this was kinda cheating as well, pretty sure my brother has a girlfriend as well. My relationship is classic student, noone knows if we are together or not, and nor do I sometimes, we are more friends with benefits. I guess it's about personal space and not getting tied down at uni. Not really heard much from him anyway.
I understand what you mean by 'our bodies are machines' I find male bodies attractive, it's part of being a girl, and I remember when I went through puberty having a crush on my cousin who was 6 years older than me at the time, so I am not new to inappropriate thoughts ha ha.
Will it happen again? It kinda has, I gave my brother a **, whoops!
We had been watching TV downstairs late at night, I was tired and laid down on the sofa, and put my head in his lap. He put his hand on my hip, but it moved to my ** and he started getting hard, and his ** was twitching against my face.
What we were watching had a ** scene, and he started squirming around, i sat up and he had a full ** in his pants.
I put my hand down his pants and started playing as we watched tv, it was too tight so I pulled them down and gave him a very casual ** as we sat watching TV.
I was a bit sleepy and forgot to hold a tissue over it, and I was surprised how high he came, and how much. It was down my arm,leg and on the sofa and his pants. I made him clean up.
What worries me is what if instead of being tired I had been **, I very casually have him a **, I guess after ** it's not that bad, but it could have been **. I must be crazy.
I understand the differences between our two stories, but what they have in common is the subject is taboo. But my age at the time and situation kind of gives me an out, somewhat, I still get uncomfortable looks if I tell someone the story. So, with that said... You are not crazy, again you both are stuck in an extreme situation, think of it like being stuck on a little island in the middle of the ocean... It might as well be the middle of the ocean. Now lets complicate the matter with both of you, being in your early 20's, and both with very active ** lives now suddenly without. That right there is like shaking a bottle of soda, the pressure is going to build up and sooner or later it's going to explode. Sorry, but self pleasure can only take you so far. I may be much older now, but I will never forget what I was like when I was your age, my ex-wife and I used to bop like bunnies all the stinking time. If we had to suddenly stop, there would have been ** to pay. You even have me thinking, even though my older sister and I were never really that close, if we were in the same situation? Well, a chain is only as strong as its weakest link, and I am sure in this isolation that link gets weaker and weaker.
So, I don't think that you are crazy, I think that you both are doing what you can to get through this insanity, while helping to keep each other sane. Like I said before, focus on the positives, and do what you must to get through it all. I have faith in you Poppy! ;)
We had a little chat last night. It started awkward but ended calm, we basically agreed that whatever happens on lockdown stays on lockdown, and the moment lockdown ends we forget it ever happens.
I don't know what it means for us, it doesn't mean we will definitely have ** again, I think what it means is that we can stop worrying about it and stressing about what if we turn to each other again, its setting a deadline in the future rather than one now and then worrying about breaking it.
We both feel relaxed and happy now, and absolutely nothing happened last night, so it wasn't an excuse to set aside all our morals. But if something did happen because we were both in need, it's ok because it's in the window.
I guess the theory is we did the bad thing, once you have done it, what's the difference if you do it twice under the same circumstances, if you know it will end at a certain point. We are grouping our shame, our dirty little secret in to one thing, not many.
You know what I feel so happy and alive this morning, and a little bit **!
When I was in the military we had a saying, "What goes TDY, stays TDY!" (Deployment.) Being military members we sometimes would do some stupid things, so depending on what happened we had a "No harm, no foul!" attitude about all that went on. I will agree that adopting this attitude is the best thing for both of you. I am happy that you found a way to take the stress out of the situation, and now you can truly focus on the positives of the situation. Of course on the plus side, your needs are getting taken care of. LOL.
It will be interesting how things progress form this time forward. Hopefully, the isolation will be ending soon and we all can return to our normal lives again.