Never thought that I would be masturbating to ** **

I'm a straight man with that over the time of growing up developed a fetish for women's navel especially outie belly buttons. I been teased throughout my life of being a virgin with a lot of women friends surrounded. I had ** officially at age 22, but I paid for it. Got addicted to ** around age 20 but did not realize the effects it had on me. My teenage years had so much failed interactions with women I actually liked and even following up it was hard. Had two drastic relationships, sexless before my 20s as well. Every sexual encounter in my life was paid for. I would go on trials of being ** free and notice benefits, usually the gym would benefit me greatly. But this would go on and off for almost now a decade.

Somehow I would somehow find myself watching ** again but it would either be fetish content, or ** always woman based. But I notice one time after a great hiatus from ** all the content that I gather up disappeared, like it was a new era of ** arriving. I actually got into a relationship in 2020 got an apartment and all but it turned out the girl I was with was trying to take over my brain and manipulate me so she got kicked out.

Got depressed and started going back to ** after almost 6 months of being free (my highest time without it since discovering it) . I would go to the belly button fetish/ outie navel section on pornhub. Seen a video with what I thought of a woman in a mask with a nice navel with a croptop stimulating it giving me pleasure. Long hair all that. Would take a good break from ** usually from time to time come to find out it had a ** in another upload of the video. I would ignore it for so long but I looked at it once, actually just watching it. It was in a croptop and looked just like a girl. But it was it weird enough stimulating to me. I would actually just watch it, but questioned my sexuality because of it. Then I gave myself the rule of not touching myself when watch the individual videos but eventually i broke it. The new stimuli made me ** even more, and I questioned my sexuality even more. Then I said ok this is the only person videos with a ** that I'll ** too. It was... for a while.

In a similar fashion I got tricked again looking for some NEW belly button fetish content but I ended see a cosplay dresser with a ** outie belly button in a skirt only to reveal a ** later in the video. I was so ** but couldn't resist watching it then finding more videos of him/her masturbating to that stimuli. Again I said this was the only two things with a ** I'll ** to but found more content in which it peaked my curiousity. Exposing there navels while in female clothing looking just like women only difference it with penises.

It's strange that it translate into real life seeing a gay guy and or a Trans and I'm repulsed or just anxious, I'm a straight man and love the ** out of women but I been a loner for so long not having official ** in 3 years. Feel like this loner thing and the way this new world is that its trying to lure me into a homosexual theme of things and I don't want to go. I think it's the hypnosis of ** that's why I'm working to stay away but certain videos linger in my brain trying to get me to open them up and ** again to these ** navel baring ppl. I working hard to be more social and just getting to know gorgeous women but they are making it hard too. I just had to let this out.

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