Afraid to get hurt again
I'll be 20 in less than 2 months and I've been hurt so much in my life, that at the end of 2007 (after a really bad rejection), I told myself I'd never care about anyone again.
Now I find myself in a situation with a man close to my age (turned 24 this year). I went back to highschool to and he's one of my teachers, but he's still got that college boy mentality.
I know I'm falling for him and I'm so afraid of being hurt again that despite all the flirting and signs he shows to me, I fear that he'll just reject me if I make a move. (we're both shy people too).
I don't know what to do right now, my life is a blurry mess. I feel like an emotionless void, a ghost. I really care about him and don't want to be hurt again, because I wouldn't be able to deal with it happening one more time.
I don't know if I should act on my feelings, what I would say to him if I deceided to do so, and how I would deal with the ensuing blow of rejection if he says no to me. All my attempts at finding answers elsewhere have failed, so my last choice is to actually approach him about it.
I'm beyond terrified and I'm angry at myself for falling for him in the first place. I don't know what to do.