A problem.

I'm pregnant. Just found out today, though I've been sure for a while. Probably four or five weeks along now.
It's my ex-boyfriends. He left me recently to be with his baby's momma (he has an eight-month old son).
In the past four or five weeks, I've had alcohol numerous times, smoked cigarettes consistantly, smoked a decent amount of bud, and blown a lot of coke. I know this is all bad for the baby- but I'm secretly hoping I'm going to have a miscarriage. I'm not going to stop smoking and I'm not going to stop doing drugs. I can't afford an abortion, but I can't have this baby either. I'm eighteen and starting school tomorrow. I really just can't.
I'm sure I'm a bad person. But I'd be an even worse mother. I'm in no position to have a baby- I can barely take care of myself. In addition, my ex and I hate each other.
I don't know. I can't tell anyone and I don't know what to do. Cocaine, cigarettes and alcohol all increase chances of miscarriages early on in pregnancy...so I'm hoping all three will be a sure-fire way of getting rid of this.

I'm going to h***, I'm pretty sure.

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  • Why are people so angry? They really need to chill the f*** out. It's your life hun- take full responsibility for it. But if you don't want the baby, go about it not having it in the right way.

  • Ur father taught you how to suck d***? You filthbag crack w****

    -jake from the past

  • I wish I could hunt you down so I could smash you in the face, you f****** piece of s***. Jake from the past, get a life, go get laid or something and find something better to do with your time.

  • Ur the lowest of low lifes you n***** b**** c***. Go give you father a b*******.

    Jake from the past

  • Yeah, okay, I'm a lowlife and you people are totally okay with the unintelligent scum that post s*** like that? Okayyy, you're a bunch of two-faced shallow a*******, then. Awesome. My faith in humanity dwindles more and more every day, and you f****** WONDER why I don't want to bring another child into this world. It's because of people like YOU.

  • sheesh.... what a sick maniac^^^^^

  • you are probloly a n***** loving b**** who will suck even a spics d*** for some blow or rock. you discust me you filthy little pig. I hope your child dies inside of you and poisins you so you die die die die> and then i will find you and rape your dead carcus with my p**** ripping hole sin you chest and stomach with my teeth until i e******** in you guts and then lick it clean> then fibnd the babies daddy and bite his c*** off and then take a happer and smash his bloddy nuts. then rape your family.

  • You are a filthy little b****. Blow some more coke filthbag

  • It's easy enough to say 'oh, just have the baby an put it up for adoption-' but it's not really that simple. I'm in school and would lose my job were I to carry the baby to birth, and then I'd be even more screwed and even less able to support myself or the baby. There are also complications with the father. He doesn't know and I'd prefer it stay that way. He'd want to keep it, though we wouldn't get back together, and he has no job, lives in another state, has no car, and has no way of supporting yet another child. He'd want to keep it, but want me to take on all responsibilities, regardless of the fact that I don't want it to begin with.

  • ^Yes, the world needs billions more of us, what a genius.

  • jus for that i hope u dont have a miscarage.

  • Like they say on movies where they accidentally nearly launch a nuclear weapon, ABORT ABORT!!!!!

  • you would be better off to quit all the bad habbits during the pregnancy, and give the child up for adoption. there are so many families who want children but cant conceive.

    its not gaurenteed that youll miscarry, you might end up having a child with a disability that you have to take care of for the rest of your life, not just the next 18 years.

  • it's your fault for not using a condom, so quit b*******.

  • goodness. well i just think you should know that Jesus loves you. and you may not want to hear this, but you may not kill the baby. you may just cause it to have serious mental problems when it is born. i really would just like you to know that you shouldn't do those things. there is always giving the baby up for adoption. drugs and alcohol aren't going to make your situation any better. you know you could end up killing yourself with all 3 of those things. if you're worried about school so much, then why are you doing drugs and alcohol. that surely won't fix the problem at all.

  • You do realise you might not kill the baby, just cause it to have a mental disability, or physical deformity? And you'd have to care for it, knowing it was all your fault?

  • how can you afford all of those drugs but not an abortion?
    there are plenty of clinics where you can ether get free or low cost abortions, why not put in the effort to look for one of those instead of destroying your body with drugs?

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