just like a stalker

I saw my favorite singer live, and it was amazing. I met him before the show, he signed my CD and took a picture with me and chatted with me for a bit. It should have been one of the happiest nights of my life, but for weeks afterward, I became sick at the thought of him.
This isn't the first time it happened to me regarding something about him. I got really upset upon finding out he no longer considered himself bisexual and identified as gay, even though I know I'd never have a chance with him even if he was straight. I eventually accepted the fact that he's gay, but after that show, it made me nervous and sick to think about him to the point where I actually vomited.
I know it's part of adolescence to love your favorite celebrities, but this went beyond the typical thought of "He's so cute, I wish I could marry him!" I was actually, physically sick and devastated at the idea that I would never be close to him, never be his friend.
And even though I find him incredibly attractive, I'm starting to wonder if I want more to BE him than to be WITH him. And that just adds a whole other layer of f***** up to this situation. *sigh*

Report this

4 Comments

  • newest
  • oldest
  • most replies
  • most popular
  • Sounds like he thought he was bi, thinking that he might someday be interested in females. Then he met you and knew that females were not the way to go. So, you basically turned him gay. But I'm sure that doesn't surprise you considering it happens all the time.

  • It's okay. You still have the power to hold off and let this fade. I suggest dumping him as a crush, and avoiding all thoughts of him. Throw out anything to do with him. The more you think about these things, the more you become trapped trust me I've worked with delusions before.

    Having something 'wrong' with you is not your fault. It's your responsibility to do what you can to not get any further wrapped u p in this. If this is your first delusion maybe you haven't learnt that yet from experience, but still I recommend leaving anything to do with this guy completely alone right now and seeing a psychologist, maybe pay for a session with a private one.

  • Well, sounds pretty messed, but I'm sure it'll sort itself out. Find someone else.

  • Get a f****** life. You should kill urself.

Account Login
Signup
Is this post inapropriate?
Is this comment inapropriate?
Delete this post?