My mom is old D:

Yesterday I looked at my mom and noticed how gray her hair was--and was terrified. I confess that now I'm tearing up just thinking how she's old, and I'm going to lose her one day and I'm so f****** scared and not ready for it. Honestly, she is the only person in my life who's ever given a s*** about me. I've had two friends in my entire life and she's one of them. We don't have a mother-child relationship; we're actually friends, haha. It's been me and her against the world because her life has sucked horribly and I'm the only one who has ever given her sympathy and cared. We're both in the same s***** boat and I don't know how I'm going to handle it when I'm alone in it. She keeps telling me how old she is and I say "no you're not; you've still got like forty years!" She's fifty-six.... and I hate old people. Like seventy year-olds who s*** their pants and forget things and smell bad. Seriously, I HATE them. So what am I going to do if my mom becomes one of those obnoxious old gross people? Or what if she dies sooner than that? God this is f****** depressing.

Haha, I know this is a lame post but really. I'm scared.

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  • This post is not lame. You're feelings are totally valid. Aging is scary, but we all go through it. Just because you're mom is 56 and has gray hair doesn't mean she's going to kick the bucket anytime soon. No one knows how long they have here on earth, so we just have to make the best of it and enjoy the time we do have with our loved ones. What happens when your mom becomes one of those "old people", gets sick, dies before you're ready to have her leave you? You will deal with it. It's the cycle of life. It's not easy, but you will get through it. But don't dwell on that.. yes, you should be prepared..but deal with it when it happens. In the meantime, talk to your mom about how you feel and your fears. You may want to speak with someone on a professional level about that too. It may help. Give you a better perspective and other coping skills. But on another note, please go and make an effort to meet people. It's great that you and your mom are so close, but you should and could benefit from having some more friends you're own age. We all need a support system.

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