Mom, I know some secrets.
Some I probably shouldn't know.
I know you smoke weed.
I even found your weed once or twice.
I know you cheated on Daddy with his best friend.
I know that's why you divorced Daddy and why Kyle got divorced too.
I know you wear short skirts and low shirts because you want more attention from men at work.
And it clearly works, considering you come back with diamonds and electronics and cookies ect.
I know you watch intervention because it keeps you from getting high. You aren't actually interested in that stuff.
Please stop this. Mom, your forty, not twenty. Stop doing this to us, please.