I don't like my engagement ring

I hate to say it... but I'm slightly ashamed of my engagement ring. Before we got engaged, I told my fiance that I wanted something simple and classic, and that's what I got. However I didn't specify a diamond size or band width and ended up with a tiny 1/4ct yellow gold solitaire that looks kind of silly on my bigger-than-average hands. At first I loved it-- I thought it looked demure and classy, but I get the impression when I show it to people that they feel sorry for me or are secretly thinking "Is that it?"

Really though, I can't blame him for choosing this ring. He knows I'm very modest and don't usually like calling attention to myself. It's not that we're poor either, we could've afforded a ring twice the price, and on the surface it seems like a perfect fit for my personality. I don't believe that the monetary value of the ring corresponds to the strength of our love, nor will it have any impact on the success of our marriage. Still, this is the one time in my life when I feel like I have a right to be proud and show off, but the ring I have leaves a lot to be desired. I'm quite shocked by these feelings of inadequacy. I feel shallow, I feel guilty, but I don't think there's very much that I can do about it.

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  • The history of an engagement ring goes back to the time when wives were bought as slaves, in shackles. Later it evolved into a wrist band. Eventually, it became a ring. It is worn on the left ring finger because the Greeks believed there was a vein in that finger that went directly to the heart.

    Women were dependent on men for survival. So when a woman shows off her engagement ring, she is subconsciously saying, "Hey, I'm not worthless. Look, somebody bought me".

  • I feel the same way, if I don't love the ring and It is not the ring of my dreams ( or at least close to it) then I don't want anything. Let's just elope and get a plain gold band.
    As for the man that said she is ungrateful.... lol... do you realize how much the ring reflects the guy too?

  • I found this post because I am feeling the exact same way. It is nice to know I am not the only one. Personally, I feel that it is silly that society expects a man (who has never bought or shopped for jewelry in his life) to pick out the 'perfect' ring. It is also unfair to pressure the woman to just like whatever she gets. Why should he 'have' to know the perfect choice, and why should she be obligated to wear something that doesn't feel right? I feel that I am not s***** about anything else in my life, but like you said, for this one thing... it should be perfect. I feel you, my dear. I still don't know what I am going to do about it though.

  • your an inconsiderate b**** to say the least.
    if you love your finance, what difference does it make?
    if your unhappy with ring tell him or get another one.
    it amazes me how stupid men are that he can't see how selfish you are.... happy divorce it will happen...

  • Save your money..... why buy something she is not going to wear. Imagine your wife picking out a car for you and you have no say so..... you just have to shut up and drive the car you hate because you don't want to seem ungrateful......

  • She has to wear the ring for the rest of her life. how is it fair she just has to wear the ugly thing forever. We need to stop this stupid tradition. My fiance bought me a but ugly ring that doesn't match me in any way. I said yes because it's not the ring it's that he wants to commit. but he has been suspocious that I don't want to marry him because I haven't shown the ring to one person unless forced and won't post any photos. He asked why I wasn't excited and I had to lie and say "its just how I am." he is gone for 3-4 weeks on the road and the ring sits on my dresser. I only wear it around him to humor him. I can't wait to legally be married but I am second guessing if it means I am stuck wearing that engagement ring. maybe I should just tell him we should keep dating no engagement. I can't tell him the truth. I'm thinking about accidentally losing it in the sink. I know he got it for less than $100. we spend that in one night going out to eat. be makes $3000 a week. I love that he is so frugal and didn't spend alot (he doesn't know I know where he got it) but did it have to be ugly?

  • You're, not your

  • You are so rude! It's how she feels. She has the right to her feelings as long as she doesn't act upon it. Do not ever call someone and inconsiderate b****! It is not nice

  • I feel guilty about the engagement ring my husband gave me. He put so much time, effort and money into it. I disliked it so much I couldn't wear it. He designed it and had it made, so we couldn't take it back. We are having one of the diamonds reset into a solitaire. This whole ring has upset me so much. Tears come out of no where. Typically I would say I'm not an overly emotional person; however, with this ring it has been a different story. I have had a whole range of emotions. My husband has been extremely understanding about it; however, it doesn't stop me feeling bad about it.

  • I gave my wife my grandmother's ring and the stone wasn't that large but it had a lot of sentimentality attached to it and she seemed pleased with that. But when her sister's fiance gave her a big rock and her friends started getting married and flashing around their rings my wife started to feel a little insecure about her ring. Well, we ended up getting divorced later so it turns out I saved myself a lot of money.

  • Sorry it sounds like you're fiance has bad taste, but look on the upside, you have a man who loves you enough to (try) get you a ring that reflects your sensibilities. Its just a symbol, who gives a crap what others think.

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