Cant get over what i have done

I cheated on my girlfriend about a year ago. We had been going out for about a 6 months at the time. I kissed a girl while on a business trip (nothing more happened), and then when i was on a holiday with some of my mates i slept with a girl i met on a night out. When i got home from the holiday i told her everything, she was really mad (obviously) but we both wanted the relationship to continue. Like i said that was over a year ago and everything is fine in our relationship now. I dont know why i did what i did, i think that i just have a very hard time turning women down. Whenever a girl hits on me it gives me a huge confidence boost and i find it difficult to stop.

So, we are both very happy now and she wants me to marry her! We are also trying for a baby. What happened never gets mentioned and i love her very much. The problem is that i still feel very guilty. The more and more serious the relationship gets the more guilty i feel about what i did. Its affecting my whole life. I have started to develop a stutter and my confidence is very low, i'm normally a outgoing kinda guy and i have a job that requires me to do a lot of public speaking but i just cant get what i did out of my head. I have always thought of myself as a good person but my actions go against that. Its really eating away at me and i dont know how to make it stop.

Thanks for reading this.


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  • You did the right thing. You told her. She forgave you, though I'm sure it was painful for you both. You gave her an opportunity to decide what she wanted to do by what she learned from you. And fortunately for you, she obviously has forgiven you, still loves you and believes in you. So, forgive yourself and enjoy your girlfriend and your life.

  • I sort of understand what you're going through. I cheated on my ex boyfriend and he forgave me for it but I couldn't get over what I did. Though I didn't sleep with anyone...I did cheat on him with his I guess our doings are the same level of shame but different scales.

    Anyway..I realized that if they forgive you and they seem to have forgotten about it, it's unfair to them to sulk about it. It makes them think what happened was more than it actually was. If you keep worrying about it they might think that maybe they shouldn't have forgiven you in the first place...which isn't good.

    You don't just have to get over IT but get over YOURSELF.
    I had to face that harsh reality a year ago and now I believe you have to do the same. Your girlfriend obviously wants to move past it so thank the stars that you ended up with someone so forgiving. Don't take her for granted again and don't s**** it up by sulking about the past. It's done but your relationship with her isn' live on.

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