I've realized why I'm so apathetic
Because despite my potential to be something great, gifted with creative talents and intelligence, I grew up truly believing that I was a hero. A protagonist. Destined for greater things - slaying dragons and being a strong beautiful princess of a great nation. Having a dramatic love. Saving the world. And when I finally faced reality and got my nose out of fantasy books, became a normal 21 year old art school student, I realized that I don't even feel like trying any more. I'm depressed because reality isn't the story I was hoping for. So I sit at home, become anti social, and develop no desire to participate in my current life.
The sad part is, I would really like to.
I just don't know how to find the self discipline to do so.
Or maybe I just can't convince myself that I want it.