I'm married, have a kid and have the hots for my ex-boss, actually what happened was that he always liked me, that is for sure, but i cud never accept the fact coz he was a Assistant vice president and i a team member, also he was my husband's facebook friend, he always told me that he liked me, but i maintained my distance with him, not sure why, but i started dating another guy in the company n he started objecting to, it like he would let me know that he did not appreciate what i was doing, but i ignored it, still not sure why, coz i was friends with his wife, then it was not even a day that i had a break up with my boyfriend and instead of mourning him, i started feeling a pang of losing my ex boyfriend, i felt a sense of loss when a day or two before i realised that my ex boss the avp is leaving. then he approached me for the first tym saying tht he had the hot's for me, n i could not believe that i missed him instead of my boyfriend then we started seeing each other, first he was ok for a parallel relationship then all of a sudden he started behaving wierd, and then he came back saying that we are good friends, i still went with the flow, now he has left the org, i feel very bad coz we had spent sometimme together, but nothing physical acutally happened, but he wanted me to be in contact with him after he left, since then it is a week n i am trying to be in contact with him, but i have feeling tht he is neglecting me, n i feel as if i'm trying to be a pile on, i feel horrible, i drink to keep myself sane, i miss him, i know ive been a horrible wife and a mother but i don't know wht should i do about my feelings, i'm stupid, i know, also knw that he just wants to bed me n thn he will be gone forever, n the worst is i feel let him bed me for once n then let him go away, but i know the emotional person i am, i want him to bed mme again an again n again...........i cannot be helped coz i'm a s** maniac, i need help. i am planning to break all contact with him, but i'm not sure how to stick to this decission, my hubby is a darling, he knows that i am innvolved with him, n he gives me my space, so do i, but it does not help the guilt that i have, coz i am involved with someone and he is not
help me, help me please, before i drown, in this sorrow, please i beg of you whoever is listening
i'm sorry for even being born
to have a husband and a beautiful child
i can't even die, for some it might even feel i am a fool,, u r rite, i am a fool, but an emotinal one, who does not want to change even after being such a s*** that i am
please god kill me, i don't wanna live any more!