Gowing apart

I am 23 years old. Married and living with my husband. Part time student and no kids.
My best friend and I are growing apart. We're the same age and I can't help but feel like we're growing apart. My boyfriend and I go out together every weekend and our group of friends will meet up along with my best friend. Lately, she's drifted. I've lost friends before. That's the story of high school. I have other close friends but she's headed in the wrong direction, drinking all the time and now drugs. I can't help but feel like I am better than her because I didn't have a baby in high school. We graduated and I'm pursuing a higher education. She's being tossed around like a used condom, and being cheated on by her boyfriend.. She sees it and won't leave him.
I am too good fot her. To good to be her friend. She won't take my advice on life.. You can't change people. I can better myself. And I already am.
This is to her. You know who you are. Our friendship ends here. You can't save everyone.
I posted this on here for someone to confirm this, my thoughts on ending my friendship. Either way this is it.

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  • Okay I'm confused on one point and maybe it was a typo - You're married and you also have a boyfriend? Or was that supposed to be you and your husband meet up each weekend?

    In any case, wanting to end this friendship is clearly your prerogative. It's hard, because you're angry and hurt and just want your friend back. You don't need confirmation, you need to do what is right for you.

    Friendships change, and not always for the better. You guys are in your 20's, and for most 20 year olds it's a time of self discovery and that includes partying and experimenting. Some do take it to an extreme. She needs to grow up a bit.

    You chose a different path than she. It's hard to see your friend partaking in activities that you clearly think is wrong for her. You are right, you can't change people. Sometimes people have to figure things out for themselves. And hopefully the process doesn't cause them any harm.

    Your friend wants to be loved at any cost, that's why she stays with her boyfriend. She'd rather be with someone, then be alone.

    Your her friend, not her parent. Don't lecture. If you really aren't ready to let it go, and want her in your life in some capacity, you have to change how you interact with her. Make an effort to find other groups of friends to hang with, limit your time with her, set clear boundaries and do things with her that don't involve partying. She'll grow up eventually.

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