New York, my Lover.
I love New York. I also love f****** random men. I'm married and kind of happy, but not fully. Only strangers can get me off.
Mu husband is the sweetest, most caring and protective person. He supports me, my ideas, and respects me. But sadly, I've lost all respect for him somehow. I don't know when, but I do know its because he is just so stable. He's the same every day. The s** feels the same. We buy the same f****** groceries every week and eat at the same restaurants every damn time.
I think we may have married wrongly, both of us. I love change, I've traveled and lived many times over in different countries. I have lovers on every continent.
I thought marrying a man like him would be good for me, and I am ashamed that I am superficial and want someone who can excite me, give me ideas and in a way, feed me bullshit so I keep on my toes.
I do want a man with taste and style. I want someone experienced and worldly. Someone who dresses well and takes pride in their appearance. A man who likes going fast, takes risk, gets what he wants and does it confidently so that I may just look on and smile when he accomplishes something, instead of always consoling, always comforting and trying to drum up his self confidence.
Insecurity rubs off, and I don't like what I'm getting.