It's so hard not to jump ahead

I'm divorced. My relationship with my ex-husband lasted a good four years before we were married and I thought that was sensible at the time.

But now I'm a bit older and I feel more impatient to settle into a committed relationship. There's this guy I've been dating for a short time, and while I haven't ever talked to him about marriage or kids (because I'm not a psycho girlfriend), I sorta wish I could. I don't like not having a serious partner.

Dec 4, 2012

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  • You will get married again and have kids, if that's what you want. But make sure that this partner is who you want to do that with. And there's nothing wrong with speaking with your partner. That should be a normal conversation for a couple to see if a future exists. Instead of wasting years of your life with someone who doesn't share the same future goals. And also if you're scared to talk to this guy, that should be a dealbreaker. Cut him loose and find someone who wants the same things as you. And that's not being psycho. That's being an adult. Talking about it is not pressuring. It's being realistic. You say you don't like not having a serious partner. Which really means you don't like being alone. Don't look at it as being alone. Look at it as time to get to know you. Enjoy where you are right now. Enjoy being single and independent. Don't jump into a long term relationship with just anyone. You've already have first hand experience being married and getting divorced, so you have a clearer idea of what you are looking for in a partner. Don't settle because you're afraid to be alone.

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