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My mother
Lets say I was drinking a little ,me and my husband use to tell each other who we would like to **,an he wanted to ** my mom. Well a couple year later playing games with the family and a little tipsy while my husband was sitting there I open my big mouth and said john wants to ** you , he turn red , in one way I wanted every one to no, my farther tease him for years. Eight years latter he got his wish, when she around he gives her a big grin.
That's funny !
The best pus I ever had was with my mother in law . My wife spent a week with her sister and took the kids . It was their vacation. It left me alone with my working Mother in law . She had wanted ** so bad for so long . I talked her into it and she easily agreed . We spent the entire weekend together in bed , I gave her about 20 ** and she loved every one . My wife came home and her mother said nothing and never will . She is extremely hot and ** for a 52 year old woman . It was absolutely fantastic . Now I am hoping to find another excuse to be alone with her .
I always wanted my mother in law and she wanted me too , that she had told me often. Only after my divorce we could be together and we enjoy each other until this day. Of course we must be discreet because we don't want to hurt her daughter/my ex.
I was watching a commercial for a product called "Life Alert" in which they had some old windbag on TV saying, "All senior citizens should have Life Alert," in a painfully slow voice while the text on the bottom of the screen displayed their advertising slogan, "Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!" when it occurred to me that they were doing it wrong. If they're going for accuracy, they should advertise their product like this: The accurate way to market safety devices for old people. Instead, they waste mid-afternoon airtime with old fossils talking about how important Life Alert is and why "senior citizens" should wear them. Here's a better idea: LET THEM DIE! I hate old people! The state I live in is filled to capacity with worthless old bastards who contribute NOTHING to society and expect us to show them respect because they're too weak, tired, vulnerable, and worthless to wipe their own **. Who needs them? I say we kill everyone over the age of 85 and sell their homes to college-bound students so we can make the world a better place instead of letting some old cantankerous ** rot away the rest of her miserable days in an empty home or, even worse, on the Florida highways. Here is how I propose to dispose of deal with the elderly. Take notes; I might decide to run for President in 2028. Redirect Life Alert to the Kevorkian Hotline.If you're so old that a low-velocity impact with the ground traps you until you slowly die, you probably don't have much to live for to begin with. Just end it all, you old bastards! Social Security should be exclusively for Veterans If you didn't serve in the military, why should we the American workers take care of you? Don't give me any of that, "I'm old and frail," **. If you wanted to retire, you should have set up your own retirement fund when you were younger. Or, failing that, served for at least one term of military service. Revoke their driving rights If your reaction time and attention span are so ** that
You become a hazard for everyone on the road, you don't deserve to drive. Too many intelligent young folks have had their lives snuffed out because some old bat valued her independence more than the lives of children. I was in class today sitting behind this old guy. Every time the teacher asked a question, he'd raise his fat hand and give some dumba remark. Put your hand down ahole, nobody wants to hear what you have to say. Every time I thought he couldn't top the BS he already spewed, he'd prove me wrong by talking some more: "I read once that the border of Asia is next to the Caspian Sea." Great **, anyone else want to contribute something completely irrelevant? At this point I go into a berserker rage and head-** my desk until I give myself a concussion. Old people should be eaten. All this b#tchin about the mad cow disease, why worry when there are so many old people we can eat. It would solve so many problems. No more old people driving 35 on the freeway. No more old people sucking up Medicare funds. No more old people on life insurance commercials. I can't stand the Liberty Medical commercials the one with that guy and his wife, with her smug grin on her face. "they deliver our supplies right to our door! Oh, you think that's pretty special huh? How about I put my foot up your **, grandma? Teach you to make those smug grins and wide-eyed expressions at me again. Then the commercial ends with the old guy winking at his wife, saying Liberty Medical gives us more time to do the fun things in life it pans to them walking by some old piece of s car. The idea of old people getting it on makes me SICK MANDATORY CASTRATION AFTER THE AGE 60.
ALL OF YOU POSTING COMMENTS ABOUT OLD PEOPLE, JUST REMEMBER KARMA IS GOING TO COME AND BITE YOU ON THE ** REEEAAAAL HARD WHEN ITS YOUR TURN TO BE OLD.
Must we go over this again? Old people are a hazard to the health and happiness of the world's youth and an unsightly waste of taxpayer wallet space who have done nothing but slowly and steadily ** the life out of America's broken-down junkie blood vessels for the past 20 to 30 years or so. And hey, not to sound like a crotchety you-know-what, but I think this country still has a lot of spirit left in it. No one would ever guess that, what with the pasty-faced vampire ** known as senior citizens riding the healthy ** of everyone under the age of 65, but it does. Old people are the reason we still have a two-party political system where nothing can ever get accomplished, because their votes help uphold archaic laws and ideas and entitled ** that characterizes the country we live in and how we should treat and perceive it. Senior bitterzens are an embarrassing sore on the lips of this country and the only reason Two and a Half Men ever got popular.
Old people are gross, they smell bad, they aren't funny, they look like ** all the time and they're cheap. Senior citizen discount, seriously? Do you really need a discount on that moldy orange and jar of pickled chicken eyes you're buying? You know you're never gonna eat that orange. It's just gonna sit on your kitchen table until one of your ** up kids comes over and picks it up and goes "Geez, ma, don't you ever throw anything out?" Then you'll just wave it off and make some pathetic joke about your age because you know everyone will feel bad and continue to let you fly under the radar like every weak, shriveled-up piece of caveman ** your age does.
I hate older people because they are a drain on the economy. Not contributing to anything while they sit in retirement homes that costs the people taking care of them thousands of dollars each month, because they couldn't better their finances when they were younger. They're also horrible drivers than put everybody on the roads at risk, and when they start developing Alzheimer, they are even rendered more useless until the day they die.