Rather be dead

I think about killing myself every single day. I used to cut my wrists it was how I dealt with pain but I wasn't suicidal!!! I am a woman "cute" according to most. But I wear tons of make up because I have facial hair and it's embarrassing. I'd rather die than let anyone see my face without make up. I hate make up it rubs off on everything! It takes so long to put on, and I look fake but others call me "cute" they don't know the real me. I want to kill myself.

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  • I read your narration with deep sense of empathy. A lot of folks have had enough confusion from a "confused world" to last for a life time! Lack of "personal identity" can bore oneself sick even to having suicide thoughts . Have I once considered suicide in my life? Yes and indeed, many folks you see that walk the streets are full of challenges and pains that were inflicted or innate. In my own case, in my teens , I thought I will not be able to achieve anything because I was abused as a child , lived in a home that always felt like an explosive device was about to ignite. I struggled with these feelings and tried to fill the void via alcohol and "street smokes". I found fake boldness that was transient. I envied and wanted to be like others. I began to steal. Well, I am an adult now, well educated, employed, married, had kids, drug/alcohol/smoke free, and really free from all my demons. How? Yes, I know that this will be the question in your heart. It sounded foolish and dreamlike but it was real. Someone gave me a copy of "New Testament and Psalms and proverbs"; a little blue covered book which could fit into my pocket. It was published by Gideon international. I began to read it from "The Gospel of John" like he advised me. I love reading and it made sense. Well, I may not be able to tell you all that happened to me but I discovered that as I read it daily, I began to be attracted to and talk to the main character in the story; Jesus and it seemed like and old self of mine was dropping off daily. At some point , I was shocked when I was out with my friends and realized that I hadn't touched alcohol in the past 2 weeks! And the stranger thing was that alcohol lost its appeal to me. In fact, it disgusted me. My friends told me that they will "give me just three months" and I will drink myself to stupor like before. well it has been years and I keep getting better; more pleasant than the person I ever tried to be. Jesus is beautiful..

  • You can have the hair removed. You can bleach it or pluck or whatever. Don't kill yourself.

  • Several men are looking for ladies with facial hairs to marry!

  • I am a man and I love very hairy ladies; even those with facial hair.

  • Some people have botched body procedures they have to live with forever and all you have is facial hair?

  • Girl if you have facial hair then talk to a professional about it. Cmon now! Killing yourself isn't worth no dang facial hair. Just get it laser off and buy skin correcting crime from Sephora.

  • Get help. Having facial hair is no reason to consider taking your life. Others have it a lot worse than you. Like the other comment said there are things that can be done to remove it. You're not alone. I'm a guy and I have something wrong with me much worse. So yeah I know what it's like but also know there is nothing worth ending it over.

  • We all have facial hair, depending on your ethnicity it can be darker or coarser. And also hormones can promote hair growth. But there are beauty products out there that can help. Waxing can help, but there is upkeep. Have you ever considered electrolysis? It could be great for you. And also with makeup, there are other make up lines that don't rub off. But you probably don't need all that make up and are beautiful just the way you are. Believe those people when they say you're cute. Of course, when you're subconscious, it's hard to believe that. More important than the make up and the facial hair is your overall mental health and outlook on life and living it, meaning wanting to kill yourself. Please go and talk to someone, it's important for you to not feel the way you are feeling and find happiness.

  • I read your narration with deep sense of empathy. A lot of folks have had enough confusion from a "confused world" to last for a life time! Lack of "personal identity" can bore oneself sick even to having suicide thoughts . Have I once considered suicide in my life? Yes and indeed, many folks you see that walk the streets are full of challenges and pains that were inflicted or innate. In my own case, in my teens , I thought I will not be able to achieve anything because I was abused as a child , lived in a home that always felt like an explosive device was about to ignite. I struggled with these feelings and tried to fill the void via alcohol and "street smokes". I found fake boldness that was transient. I envied and wanted to be like others. I began to steal. Well, I am an adult now, well educated, employed, married, had kids, drug/alcohol/smoke free, and really free from all my demons. How? Yes, I know that this will be the question in your heart. It sounded foolish and dreamlike but it was real. Someone gave me a copy of "New Testament and Psalms and proverbs"; a little blue covered book which could fit into my pocket. It was published by Gideon international. I began to read it from "The Gospel of John" like he advised me. I love reading and it made sense. Well, I may not be able to tell you all that happened to me but I discovered that as I read it daily, I began to be attracted to and talk to the main character in the story; Jesus and it seemed like and old self of mine was dropping off daily. At some point , I was shocked when I was out with my friends and realized that I hadn't touched alcohol in the past 2 weeks! And the stranger thing was that alcohol lost its appeal to me. In fact, it disgusted me. My friends told me that they will "give me just three months" and I will drink myself to stupor like before. well it has been years and I keep getting better; more pleasant than the person I ever tried to be. Jesus is beautiful.

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