The Donation Baskeet

One day I was at church and the donation basket came around. Being the good man I am, I reached into my wallet and pulled out a 20. I put it in the basket and church went on. Later that night I was hanging out with my girlfriend when she grabbed for my p**** which soon became stiff and throbbing. One thing led to another and we were about to have s**. I reached into my wallet for a condom but it wasn't there. You won't believe the look I got on my face when I realized what happened. To this day she won't let me forget it. We laugh about it at least once every week.

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  • I read your narration with deep sense of empathy. A lot of folks have had enough confusion from a "confused world" to last for a life time! Lack of "personal identity" can bore oneself sick even to having suicide thoughts . Have I once considered suicide in my life? Yes and indeed, many folks you see that walk the streets are full of challenges and pains that were inflicted or innate. In my own case, in my teens , I thought I will not be able to achieve anything because I was abused as a child , lived in a home that always felt like an explosive device was about to ignite. I struggled with these feelings and tried to fill the void via alcohol and "street smokes". I found fake boldness that was transient. I envied and wanted to be like others. I began to steal. Well, I am an adult now, well educated, employed, married, had kids, drug/alcohol/smoke free, and really free from all my demons. How? Yes, I know that this will be the question in your heart. It sounded foolish and dreamlike but it was real. Someone gave me a copy of "New Testament and Psalms and proverbs"; a little blue covered book which could fit into my pocket. It was published by Gideon international. I began to read it from "The Gospel of John" like he advised me. I love reading and it made sense. Well, I may not be able to tell you all that happened to me but I discovered that as I read it daily, I began to be attracted to and talk to the main character in the story; Jesus and it seemed like and old self of mine was dropping off daily. At some point , I was shocked when I was out with my friends and realized that I hadn't touched alcohol in the past 2 weeks! And the stranger thing was that alcohol lost its appeal to me. In fact, it disgusted me. My friends told me that they will "give me just three months" and I will drink myself to stupor like before. well it has been years and I keep getting better; more pleasant than the person I ever tried to be. Jesus is beautiful.

  • Avoid Immoral Women
    1My son, pay attention to my wisdom;
    listen carefully to my wise counsel.
    2Then you will show discernment,
    and your lips will express what you’ve learned.
    3For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey,
    and her mouth is smoother than oil.
    4But in the end she is as bitter as poison,
    as dangerous as a double-edged sword.
    5Her feet go down to death;
    her steps lead straight to the grave.
    6For she cares nothing about the path to life.
    She staggers down a crooked trail and doesn’t realize it.
    7So now, my sons, listen to me.
    Never stray from what I am about to say:
    8Stay away from her!
    Don’t go near the door of her house!
    9If you do, you will lose your honor
    and will lose to merciless people all you have achieved.
    10Strangers will consume your wealth,
    and someone else will enjoy the fruit of your labor.
    11In the end you will groan in anguish
    when disease consumes your body.
    12You will say, “How I hated discipline!
    If only I had not ignored all the warnings!
    13Oh, why didn’t I listen to my teachers?
    Why didn’t I pay attention to my instructors?
    14I have come to the brink of utter ruin,
    and now I must face public disgrace.”
    15Drink water from your own well—
    share your love only with your wife.
    16Why spill the water of your springs in the streets,
    having s** with just anyone?
    17You should reserve it for yourselves.
    Never share it with strangers.
    18Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
    Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
    19She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
    Let her b****** satisfy you always.
    May you always be captivated by her love.
    20Why be captivated, my son, by an immoral woman,
    or fondle the b****** of a promiscuous woman?
    21For the lord sees clearly what a man does,
    examining every path he takes.
    22An evil man is held captive by his own sins;
    they are ropes that catch and hold him.
    23He will die for lack of self-control;
    he will be lost because of his great foolishness. PROVERBS 5

  • Will you PLEASE just shut the f*** up

  • LOOKS LIKE it was copied from your church book; the bible. Here is another one

    1 Corinthians 6: 8 Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers and sisters. 9 Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have s** with men[a] 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.


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