Called for

Don't praise me I scare
Don't touch me I fear
Don't make me believe am loved I can't take anymore.
Push me away that's where I belong
Don't try to hold me near my heart is broken into pieces that I can't ever gather.
In this world I loved you more than I can justify and it's true you have hurt me more than anyone else on earth.You have broken me ,hurled my heart to its deepest core.
I know you can say why and how do I say this now dear everything can't be answered something has to be felt sometimes.
Many times I have felt you don't deserve a single thing my precious emotions I have wasted , again I have consoled myself everything I have fuelled you were clear from the start then why do I blame ..
I always intruded myself ,now if am being asked to leave the fault lies on me not on others..am was always an outsider and always will be ..The more readily I accept better was for me but with reasons known better to me I have always denied to cuddle the truth.
I created false hope,i traded my self respect,i called all humiliations myself..and now I only play the blame game.It was always I from the beginning to end never was we.
But I have learned a lesson when one is hurt to extreme after a point there lies no pain and now I don't feel anything..
It's all lie,a game of hearts that all play according to own advantage..
I dnt know what I have scribbled don't feel like going through it again also....tired I feel , used up is the feeling and the culprit is only me and it breaks me to think I called for everything myself none responsible for the pain and misery....

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  • Reminds me of my ex.

  • I am missing too

  • Someone once that those who trumpet the loudest of their miseries are the most deserving of them, and holy smokes I'm starting to believe that. Beware: when you go out fishing (talking to you o.p. so do do have the good decency to pay attention), when you go out fishing on the Internet, and that's what you are doing, you may reel in a hug or two from a couple friendly fish... or you may get a shark. So here's this. You wanna be a doormat? Great, my boots are dirty. You wanna pick yourself off the ground? That's up to you, great choice though it may be, but I think you're a whiny selfish juvenile for wanting others to do it for you.

  • You are the embodiment of death. Get some sleep. Eat some good food. Live again.

  • Thanks

  • It is a self–fulfilling prophecy which you have wrought.

  • You are absolutely correct,my friend

  • Please don't continue to allow yourself to believe that you deserve to hurt and to be left aside, or to believe that there's some cosmic significance to your misery. None of that is true. Get some help to try to get out from under the dark cloud of depression, and to stay there. There's nothing poetic about being away from the light, regardless of how you got there. Just please, please get back into the light. Start with professional help. Find someone who can assess the damage and assist you in trying to fix it. It can be done. And you are worth doing it for.

  • Thanks for the concern it's nothing serious I love to write dark sometimes and this one was the result of the same when my pen revolted:).
    But it gave a nice feeling to know that there are readers on earth who not only reads but also sympathize..
    Rest all is ok..I.me and myself..

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