My parents spanked me until I was 21
My mother and father were very strict and spanked me until I got married when I was 21. There were quite a few incidents I could discuss but I will talk about one. I moved away from home briefly when I was 19. This was mostly to escape the rules and punishments, I also wasn't getting along with my sister who was 15 at the time. The morning I left my sister and I had gotten into a fight and my mother took her side again. I smarted off to my mom and she grabbed my arm and took me to my bedroom. She grabbed my large wood backed hairbrush, sat on the edge of my bed and pulled me over her lap. She lifted my nightgown and lowered my **. She spanked me until I screamed and cried in front of my little sister. I packed my stuff and moved in with a friend later that day. I ended up coming back home about 6 months later and was spanked until I got married to my husband of almost 19 years.
My parents now deceased but still the lessons learned mean that I am hesitant to speak my mind. I tend to agree with whoever I am talking to.
I get the strong impression that you are mentally ill.