I have a crush on a dead person
I have a crush on Caligula, the 3rd roman emperor. He died 2,000 years ago. I usually fall for anime characters. This is my first time liking someone real who died... I don't fall for real alive people often. I have faked having crushes on people who are alive and not an anime character to look normal to other people... I don't want to be made fun of. I was made fun of and bullied in middle school and high school.
I dream of Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (Caligula's real name) almost every night. When I liked Sasuke Uchiha I had dreams of him every night for the year of 2011. It's not out there for me to dream of my crush this often.
Caligula was the one who told the senate he wanted to make his horse consul, but never did. I'm guessing he was joking. In my dreams he looks like only one of his many busts; his appearance doesn't change but I find him to be extremely hot. I'm bisexual; and a female.
It's just I have never liked a dead person before. I don't want s** with his corpse, it's not necrophilia or anything twisted and gross like that. I just wish I could be with Caligula and be his girlfriend or wife, but wife in the terms of love, not in the arranged marriage for other reasons. I research Caligula a lot, and talk to a picture of his bust, and rub his cheek, I even kiss Caligula. I try to translate to latin, because I believe that was Caligula's spoken language.