Don't Love My Mother

I would never say this aloud to anyone other than a therapist, but...I don't think I love my mother. She wasn't truly abusive or negligent, but she is the most unhappy person I've ever known, and as long as I have known her she has brought misery wherever she goes.

Still, despite being well aware that I will probably never be able to please her no matter what I do, I still find myself trying harder with her than with anyone else.

I'm 35 now and the mother of two young children. I know that my focus should be on my family, but I let my mom take up more headspace than I can even believe.

I am scared stiff that my children will someday feel about me as I do about my mother. In a way, her bad example serves as a constant reminder that I should be better.

I don't love my mother, but I can't cut her out of my life, and I just want her to be happy. I hope that I can get past this.

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