WTF, My birthday

So, where do i start.

So it was coming up to my birthday and i asked for something. But this item was a nit pricey so other family members chipped in. So i got this item at my "party". But a few days before my birthday my mum said she had something else to give the morning of. So, as a human i asked what it was. Because my mum is also a human, she told me to shut up. I then asked was it technology based. she said no, but she said it required power.

So the next day, my human instincts made me curious, so i went looking. i has looking around her room and noticed that her bottom draw had no handles.
So, i opened it.

At first i saw a brown paper bag, a small bag, a power cord, screwdriver and the draw handles.

I then looked in the bag and there was a f*** blue vibrator and a toy cleaner.
My body went into shock.

So i picked up the vibrator and looked at it. At first it looked like a 6" plastic d****. I then turned the what was the batter cap and it started to vibrate.

what the f***?

i turned it of and looked at the cleaner.

It then crossed my mind what was in the paper bag. i was right.
Condoms.

i opened the bag a there where 2 boxes. 1 was open and the other one was sealed.

i paused...
*requires power?*
oh what the f***.

so on my birthday morning my parents came out with a bag. i opened the bag and there was a blue 6" inch vibrator, toy cleaner and a 12 pack of condoms.

That was the most awkward moment i have ever had in my life.

Report this

4 Comments

  • newest
  • oldest
  • most replies
  • most popular
  • You should ask your parents to help you use it, imagine the fun.

  • They'd have done better buying you dictionary! 😂😂😂😂

  • This is very thoughtful from your parents

  • You'll have to use the vibrator because your moms boyfriend is not interested. ;)

Account Login
Signup
Is this post inapropriate?
Is this comment inapropriate?
Delete this post?