Not knowing what is going on

All this happened almost 10 years ago, but I still don't quite understand it. My boyfriend Jim and I were 21, and we had a serious sexual relationship. There wasn't anything we hadn't done except b***** wounds and gang f******.

As much as he was giving me, I was still h**** for more. He knew it because he could see me checking out other guys, and when I danced with someone else I always let them rub my t*** and ass and suck on my t*** if they wanted. I let one guy finger f*** me for about half an hour while we danced, and anybody who cared to look could see me o***** 3 or 4 times. I really didn't know what Jim thought about the t*** and ass stuff, but he was visibly angry at the finger f******, so I had to take him home and f*** his brains out before he would speak to me.

One night we were at the club and a guy named Alan asked me to dance. He was incredibly handsome and had a great body. When we danced a slow dance, I could feel a really big c*** getting hard. On top of all this, he was nice. He didn't say crude stuff to me, he listened to what I was saying, he laughed at my jokes. As we danced, I could feel my nipples and c*** getting hard, and I was loving it. After most of an hour of this he asked me if I wanted to go home with him. I said yes, but I had to make up some excuse for my loser boyfriend to leave early. He told me to do that, leave by myself, and he would text me his address in a few minutes. I sat the next dance out and tried to look sick. Jim asked me what was wrong, and I told him I was sick to my stomach and thought I should go home. He said okay, and he would call me.

I left, got my car, and drove down the street a few blocks then pulled over and waited for Alan to text. It was about 20 minutes, and it crossed my mind that he wasn't going to text me. Then my phone buzzed, and the message was only an address. I was thrilled, and drove there immediately, a short trip of less than a mile. It was a medium-sized house, and a few lights were on. I knocked, and Alan opened it up, pulled me in, and gave me a big kiss. Then he took my hand and took me down the dark hallway to a darker back bedroom, closed the door, and began stripping both of us. He pushed me down on my knees and told me to suck his c***. It was even bigger than it felt when we were dancing. After several minutes of that, he took me to the bed, rubbed my c*** until I was ready to come, and f***** me hard until I did.

I told him it was great. He said he had something I was going to love, and he got up from the bed in the pitch-black room and went out into the hall, closing the door. A minute later the door opened and I felt a man get between my legs and start f****** me. I assumed it was Alan until I heard Jim say, "How's that feel, s***? You like getting a lot of c****, don't you?" I was shocked and a little scared, but I tried to give him a good f*** in the hope that it would improve his mood- that had usually worked in the past. I still didn't know what had happened to Alan. Jim pounded my p**** and came on my t*** within two or three minutes, much faster than he usually did. Then without a word he got up and left, closing the door.

A minute later the door opened again and I hoped that it was Alan coming back for seconds. But I quickly felt a different body, someone I didn't know, and he rolled me over, spit in his hand to lube his c***, and shoved it hard into my ass. Normally I love taking it in the ass, but he was brutal, and I yelled at him to stop. He went on for 15 or 20 minutes, then came, pulled out, and left, closing the door. He had never said a word.

A minute later another guy entered the dark room, rolled me over, and shoved into my p****, where he drilled me for 10 minutes or so until it felt like he was going to come. He pulled out, raised up and came all over my face. Some got in my mouth and nose, and I was sputtering while he got up and left.

A minute after that, the door opened again and I quickly felt two guys competing for my p****. One got in and he rolled me up on top of him. The other guy stood behind us and shoved his c*** into my ass. They see-sawed back and forth brutally, and I screamed at them to stop. They laughed, but still didn't say a word.

They got up and left, and the door opened again and it sounded like all 7 of them came in without saying a word. One guy rolled me over and shoved into my ass. It felt like Jim. He pounded me for a few minutes, then pulled out, turned me over, and shoved his s***-covered c*** into my mouth, where he poked it in and out until he came, then held my head in place so I had to swallow all his c**, s*** and all. He pulled out of my mouth, stood up, and said, "Filthy cheating s***!" All the guys standing around the bed laughed and laughed, then they all left.

I was mortified, and my p****, ass, and jaw hurt a lot. I lay there a long time crying. The worst of it was that I really was a filthy cheating s***, so while I got horribly abused I deserved it. After a while I turned on the light, got dressed, and left the room. The house was empty and I felt like s***.

Jan 24, 2020

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  • You deserve it you useless b****

  • You should rob Alan. He would deserve it.

  • You were violated. Even if you were engaging in illicit s** with the man you intended to meet, it whirled out of control and you were raped by a succession of other men you did not know, as well as your idiot so-called boyfriend. You can certainly get the police involved and make their lives change through the justice system. This probably sounds like an embarrassing can of worms; and it is. However you now have the power to seek justice and it will be a stressful process that makes you re-think many ideas about what justice, and the behaviors leading up to it, bring. If you can identify these idiots then by all means prosecute. At the same time you need to grow up and decide what kind of life you really want. As human beings we must create our own conditions of success. I am on your side regarding the crime but I ask you to grow up and learn how positive the rest of your life can be. As you learn and grow older I think you could be an excellent advocate for others who need an advocate and friend.

  • No, you didn't deserve it, they raped and brutally abused you, nobody deserves that, period! So please stop believing this lie that you deserved it. Sometimes people cheat, but that doesn't give anyone permission or justification to abuse them in any way, shape or form!

  • I agree that jim and his raping fiends should be jailed.

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