I hate being a mother

That I have 3 healthy children who I dreamed about for years, but it turns out that I actually hate parenting with a passion that scares and saddens me beyond words.
I try so very hard to feed them well, educate them widely, provide experiences, avoid technology and give them a 'wholesome' life with lots of opportunities and they throw everything back in my face.
They complain, they are lazy, they need to be reminded 14 times to do something, they tell me how they aren't allowed things their friends are allowed and don't respect their belongings.
I make food from scratch that we lovingly grow and they push the plate away with a scowl. The oldest one has to cook once a week, but even that is a grumble. They all have to share some of the cleaning, but mostly it happens with a loud moan.
I'm so very tired of behaviour charts and being reasonable, all I want is to be able to travel back in time and tell my other self that I won't like it. I want them to be gone without the memory that they ever existed as to lose them would be heartbreaking. I want to bring back the time when you were allowed to whack them.
I want to be free and live my life unencumbered by this crushing disappointment of what i was sold as 'the joy of parenting'. I hate to feel like this and most people are shocked if i mention it. They say 'but you do such a good job'. The truth is very different inside my heart.
I wish I could find a happy place with this job I only wish i could have tried out before I committed, because I never would have.
I want the world for my children, but sometimes think they'd be better off without me living with them because they might get a fun mother instead. Or maybe one who didn't care so much that she's forgotten how to laugh.

Feb 8, 2020

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  • This makes you a better mother than you thought

  • That's because you, like way too many people, fell for the "must make babies" propaganda. You thought it would be all attention and soft things and found out the hard way (it's always done the hard way) that there's a lot more to it and most of that sucks. Babies have been being made for millions of years and yet breeders are constantly "surprised" how draining the reality is. No sympathy here =)

  • Oh wait, I love it. “You fell for the must make babies propaganda” so you admit there is misinformation yet you feel no sympathy. Brilliant...the milk of human kindness knoweth no bounds.

  • There is misinformation and there are also billions and billions of parents walking the earth right now who could tell them what it's really like but breeders (like girls) think it will be different for them. When it isn't we're supposed to all go "Aw we're so sorry for you, have all the privileges you want!" NO. The choice was made, and yes it was a CHOICE, you do not need to make babies. The milk of human kindness is reserved for people who think before they do something stupid

  • Awesome, thanks for helping to make her feel better. Remind me to seek you out for help with terminal illness, another thing you don’t know how bad it is until you are ‘doing it’ and then it’s too late as well. Pep talk fail. =)

  • Breeding =/= terminal illness

    One is a CHOICE, the other sometimes happens and there is not anything you can do about it! Nice straw man attempt. Now shut up.

  • Then you should run away or die.

  • Both excellent suggestions. You should work in counselling.

  • No sweetheart, you should! People love constant sarcasm and emotional reactions with no thinking behind them. You would be healing people left and right with your victim attitude.

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