Not good enough to be with him. He's now so small, ripped, and happy. I'm happy for him. I exercise and my body makes me wind up in the hospital, even if done right. My body's system flares up with exercise, and now I can barely eat any foods. I eat few foods only through a tube now. Despite this, my body won't lose the weight. I don't know what to do. I'm afraid he will leave cause I'm not a 9 like him. I'm too ashamed to be intimate because of this. Even though he doesn't fat shame me, he calls attention to anyone else who has any meat on their bones now, even if they're a normal size. It makes me think he secretly thinks that way of me or worse. We've fought so long and hard to stick together in this relationship, but I feel like he will leave eventually because of my body. I feel like I have no control, I've let him down, and I only want to hide.