Unwanted

I’m having a really hard time at home with my wife. I love her and care for her deeply. I constantly flirt and tease and hint and touch and show her emotional support. I’m a giving and kind person with a diverse personality. She NEVER initiates any kind of physical encounter. It makes me feel unwanted and unseen. I mentioned this to her and she got upset with me, and emotional, and I once again needed to support her. I tried bringing it up again and she makes it about s**, which it is, but it’s not. It’s about feeling validated as a man, as a provider, as a caretaker and as a lover.

Meanwhile my body is screaming to be touched. My heart is aching to see desire for me reflected in someone’s eyes.

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  • Don't give up on her. She needs to be kissed, hugged, non-sexual touch (without expectations of anything...i mean it...nothing). Show her you love HER and not what she can do with her body. Hold her hand, touch her back, treat her with respect and do little extra thoughtful things. She doesn't feel wanted and maybe feels like you aren’t as touchable/reachable as you think. Your idea of flirting- might be annoying and not exactly what she is looking for. I promise she wants and needs you. Once my husband figured this out, I went from being just like your wife to f****** his brains out. I literally crave him all day long now and cant get enough. Im thankful he didn't find someone else and put in this “new” effort.

  • ...also, spend time on foreplay. MAKE OUT WITH HER for a few MINUTES instead of a little kiss and going straight for the crotch (hers or yours). Get her warmed up and make sure she really enjoys herself. The more you get her worked up before s**, the better time you will BOTH have and eventually she will come out of her shell and want you more.

    Tell her the next day “Thank you” for the s** (or foreplay or whatever) and let her know you enjoyed yourself while watching her or whatever that sounds grateful to have her and what you found hot about the evening. Mention you enjoyed spending time with her. If she is at work at you text her that - she will know you are thinking of her and the s**. She will be hot about it all day and likely come home hoping things happen again.

    Relationships take work and if she is depressed or sad- she needs this extra attention from you so she can return the favor and fill your sexual needs.

  • I was with a guy in the same situation he was into rough abusive s**. His wife hadnt touched him since they had a kid.

  • So, what did you do with him? Did you f*** him hard? Did you suck his d***? I hope you were nice to him. I really like kind and loving women like you. Tell me more.

  • All you guys in sexless marriages, listen carefully.

    1.You are NOT going to change your wife/gf/so. Don't waste your time, energy, and effort. Be nice to her and discharge your duties. Particularly if you have kids. Some women just don't have the libido and they are f*****' a*******. I've seen many and know how heartless they can be. Don't bother with them. DON'T EVER GET INTO AN ARUGMENT. IT WILL NEVER HELP.
    2. Go look for some other woman and f*** her brains out. Be super nice to her, treat her like a queen, and she will give you all the p**** you want. Trust me, there are many, many married women who are dissatisfied. Do it discreetly. Work h****** her, eat her out till she moans in ecstasy, then pound her as hard as you can. Don't lie to her. Tell her it is just about s** and nothing more.
    3. Don't talk about this to ANYONE including your close friends and family. Just shut up and enjoy. While you get one, look for others on the side. Develop a stable of willing c**** and you will never be deprived of p****. The key is to treat them extremely well, take care of their sexual needs, make them feel emotionally superior and happy.
    4. Happy f*****'. Share your stories. Tell us your intimate details anonymously. This will help others in similar situations.

  • Similar to how i feel. She always says she will think about it more, but does nothing.

  • Yup yup I have a relatively sexless marriage as well, devoid of affection. Self stimulation is getting old.

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