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I don't know why I do what I do
I'm addicted to watching amateur ** video online and I'm especially addicted to the ones that show a drunk, sleeping or passed out girl and someone's taking video of them exposing her or ** her or ** her. So I have a brother and sister both older than me. We all still live at home but my sister and I go to different colleges and my brother works. I've started drinking a lot and when I get home I'm lucid enough that I know what I'm doing and either go to bed in just a tee or just ** and just cover with a thin sheet. I always leave my door open and make sure I'm exposing a little ** or spread my legs to show a little ** or my **. I usually fall right asleep. I gotta figure my brother and parents have seen me but none of them say anything. The only thing my parents have said is I should straighten my life up but I'm over legal age so they can't tell me what to do. My sister has only said I should drink less and has had to shut my door a couple times. I want to show more but I'm not sure what to do next so someone sees me and maybe touches me or maybe videos me and posts it. I really wish my brother would bring his friends to see me. I wanna see the video or maybe I'd be awake enough to know what's happening but pretend I'm asleep. That's my fantasy and yea it's a little embarrassing.
Https://www.xvideos.com/profiles/j9161jj
When I was a teen drug ** was a popular party 'prank.' The first time I saw it happen I was filled with jealousy and arousal. I wanted to be her. I wanted to be next. I saw it as a way of being totally slutty without guilt or blame. Being subtle that I was willing to be targeted didn't work. I ended up having to ask my brother to let the guys know that I was eager to be 'pranked' like that.
Waking up not knowing where I was, where my clothes were and who did what to me is a HUGE turn on. For me, the humiliation I felt during the walk of shame was well worth the morning headaches.
Your desires are not unusual
I was a ** until I met my husband (just celebrated our 25th anniversary)
Before we met I had slept with over 100 men/boys while I was between the ages of 14 and 24.
I slept with boys my age and men in their 40’s and 50’s. I slept with men of all races as well.
Once I slept with my husband and felt what it was like to “make love” and not just ** I was hooked. I love my husband and have not been with another man since.
I only wish that he could have been my “first” and not my last.
I was not my wife's first but have been her last for over 48 years. I believe that she was and is a better lover having had ** with other men.
My 2nd wife was barely 19 when we got married, what I liked about her was she was very eager sexually which at the time I found to be great.
Now I knew she had had some boyfriends, but then I was a bit older and had my onw share of experiences plus I was married for a few short years.
I divorced her because she was unfaithful while I was in Vietnam.
One day we ran into a couple of guys on the street, and quickly it became clear they both knew my wife, I was almost like a long lost family reunion.
Suspicious, I asked and she admitted to a ** with those two, and then admitted more. Turned out she was way over 100 different lovers by the tender age of not yet 20?
I began to notice when some other men she ran into were clearly more intimate acting than one would expect, it got to the point where I couldn't take it, it seemed to be everyone.
End of that marriage also.