Frustrating Home Life

My wife and I are older but have only been married about 10 years. We are both the products of prior long term, abusive relationships. When we first got together we made up for lost time in the ** department, getting it on where ever we happened to be at the drop of a hat. Unfortunately, now our ** life has become predictable, and infrequent due to my wife's various health issues.
We have recently allowed a female friend who needed a place to live to rent a room from us. You can guess where this is going. She confessed to me that she had always had a thing for me and I leveraged that into a very brief affair.
But now she has developed a sense of guilt and no longer wants to carry on unless my wife approves and participates. She would be up for a poly relationship but that's not likely to happen. I love my wife with all my heart but I have developed strong feelings for our friend as well. Long story short, I now live with two women I love but not getting any sexual satisfaction from either.