I'm excited to die
I don't want to kill myself. I just don't wanna be here. I was thinking about random things and then imagined something that would wipe out the entire world within a few seconds...
I just thought about how if I was dead, I wouldn't have to deal with anything. Maybe 1 or 2 people would be upset about it, but I can't feel bad for it when I'm dead right?
I'm just really really excited to die one day. Whether I do it myself or it happens naturally, I'm extremely excited. When I get excited I get an adrenaline rush, and that's exactly what happened when I thought about dying. Everything being over. Eternal rest.