My life is mess

For the past 2 yrs my life has changed from a happy go lucky to a living nightmare. I was a homemaker giving tutions, with a 2 yr son. My husband was working in an MNC and earning a lot. We had two houses and two cars. I also had a pair of caring parents and a younger brother.
Then suddenly everything changed for son was diagnosed with autism and within 24 hrs my husband left his job coz he cant adjust. Both of us started to set out for finding jobs. I was working on a research project which was approved and hence I had to join full time. My son was getting nowhere. My hubby is still without a job so we sold one of the houses. I put my son into a special school, he doesnt speak or work or toilet train and my hubby though looks after him uses him to mask his folly. He says he cant get a job since he had to take care of our son. My parents are ready to babysit, yet my husband insists I have to stay home when he will go out TO FIND A JOB!! And now when I am selected for a govt job. a good one you see I am a PhD, I came to know my brother is a gay and my father had an exitramarital affair with his office collegue from past two yrs. I dont know what to do, with whom to share as these problems if discussed will hamper those involved. My boss pressurises me for giving so less time for research. I get to sleep so less I am having regular headaches. My son disturbs all night yet my hubby insists I sleep beside him so that he can have a good nights sleep.Every day I have to travel 2 hrs to get to work. He used the car when he used to go to the office. I dont earn as much so I am left to public transport. I have to care for my son whenever I am home.
I am tired of lieing to people about how sacrificing my hubby is as he is taking care of our son while I am building up a career. Actually he is unable to find anything and has been out of work for past 1 1/2 yrs.
Sometimes I feel like dieing or killing my son. He expects me to manage both worlds while he will wallow in self pity. Please advice he needs councelling and I am really really tireed. I am losing the battle and faith.

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  • I won\\\\'t comment on your husband; rather, I want to comment on your son. I\\\\'m also the parent of an autistic child. My daughter is more high functioning than your son, I think, but she still resists potty training, and has for months insisted on sleeping with us. But you know, I absolutely love my little girl, and my wife and I have accepted autism is part of who she is. Please, I sincerely hope you don\\\\'t really mean that you want to kill your son. Remember, the problem is between you and your husband; your son needs all the love and support you can give him. Search out other parents with autistic children to share your frustrations with. Best of luck

  • You certainly have your hands full. It is time for your husband to step up and be a man. I suggest you write this down and show it to him. NO EDITING. Show him exactly what you are going through and how you feel. Are you a person of faith? I sure hope so. You need to pray and seek the peace that comes in the midst of the storm. Update us on what happens when you share your heart with your husband.

  • You are certainly in a rough spot... And here I though I was. Perhaps it will make you feel better to know that your suffering has made someone else realize they don't have quite so bad. Thank you.

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