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Jealous and hurt

I thought I was over the father of my child cheating on me and leaving me. He married the women I caught him with in our home. They have a 3 yr old and a 2 yr old now. I pretend to be ok w/ everything for the sake of our son. I am a lot better than I was initially. Even attended church w/ them for a while until I realized I was thinking not thinking very Christian thoughts as I sat near her in church. I blame him for using up the best years of my life. When I was young, healthy and beautiful. He's a very good dad to our son. That's all that should matter. Deep down inside I hate him. Now I'm single riddled w/ chronic illnesses and heavy and bloated from the meds. I feel old and run down. I wasted almost 10 yrs of my life just to be a struggling single mom trying to make ends meet even w/ the small amount he gives me in child support. I spend a riidiculous amount of $ on meds for diabetes and other chronic illnesses. I work full time and dont qualify for anything as far as some kind of assistance. Yet I smile everyday and play nice w/ him and his wife. Sometimes I just want to die. But I keep on because of my loving son and my religious beliefs. Some days are good. Today I'm feeling so alone and down

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    • Basically you got fat and became unattractive.

      Women seem to think its ok to let themselves go as they're married....urm no!!!!!!

      You should if looked after yourself,worn make up and been more sexually appealing to him.

      Bet the other woman is gorgeous.

    • Try to think of the good times when you had your ** seen to each night

    • ** isn't everything!! Think about the bigger picture man.Use your brain and conscience :)

    • (((hugz)))

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