Im falling hard for my bestfriend
Im falling hard for my bestfriend. Again. Before this summer, I hadnt really ever thought of him as anything else but as my bestfriend. He was always the one who I would go to for my boy troubles, or who I would get advice from, or just the one I would have fun talking to in general. This summer, I finally realized that I liked him. But he is ridicuously shy around me, so I had no idea he liked me as well. Since I didnt think he liked me, I didnt want to ruin our friendship by telling him how I felt, and I made out with another boy. In front of him. Not purposely, but I did, and I regretted it. His brother then told me that my bestfriend had been really angry that I had done that, but now just thought of me as a friend. In September, we talked over what happened and finally confessed that we really did still have feelings for eachother, the only problem being he lives 2 hours away and is usually busy with tournaments on weekends. We did go out for a month despite that fact, but broke up because we didnt see each other often. Now he has a new girlfriend who he likes, and thinks I just want to be bestfriends with him, nothing more. I really want to be happy and supportive and play the loving caring bestfriend role, but the truth is, I'm still in love with him. And soon my family and I are moving to where he lives, and I'm not sure how he will react when I tell him. I'm afraid that when I see him, I'll fall for him even more. I miss him. Yet I'm sure he wont feel the same way. And even though we are ridiculous and argue about every little thing, there is just something about him that makes me smile. Hes the one that makes my heart jump and my stomach tie up in knots no matter how happy I am otherwise. And I can't stop thinking about him.