Actual NORMAL confessions...

I confess that I always clog the toilet because I take huge painful s**** (I have intestinal problems, so this is common...). But I ALWAYS blame the clogged toilet on my younger sister, who is notorious for also taking huge dumps. Hahaha. My parents believe me every time.

Also, every Christmas I'M the one who wakes up first, way too early, and wakes up aformentioned younger sister. Then I make her wake up my parents and tell them SHE woke up first and forced us out of bed. (She is really easy to manipulate). I confess I'm still excited about Christmas, but I'm eighteen and I'm the "negative" one in the family. I honestly hate most everything, so they think I hate christmas, but I secretly love it.

Confession three: I can't sing. I'm afraid to. But who doesn't sing along to their mp3s? I would give anything to be able to sing, but I can't so I whisper-sing to myself when listening to music. I should sing out loud but I'm embarrassed at my s***** voice, and I don't want anyone to hear my sing because... I can't. Ahaha. Pathetic. My secret wish has always been to be in a band (lame, yes I know) and I can't even f****** sing, f***.

Sigh. These confessions are normal compared to the "I wanna f*** my sis soooo bad and c** on her t***" confessions. (I really would NOT want to f*** my sis. She is uglyyyyyy)

Sigh.

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  • Hahahah!! You f****** rock!!! S**** the above comment! You should write a book!!

  • agreed!

  • Well Ace, you do seem quite obsessed with your sister. You're acting out with her like you have a schoolboy crush. But setting that aside. At 18, you're also rather juvenile in the way you act. Since you felt the need to address your bowel movements so thoroughly I do have a theory on that, as well. I think maybe you've had your ass reamed too many times and your sphincter muscles have pretty much disappeared. Thus, your discharge is uninterrupted by any control mechanisms. If you're going to continue to troll truck stops and take on all comers start doing some ass reflex exercises. Sort of like kegel exercises women do to keep the taint tight. Good luck, Ace. And have a Merry Christmas without shame.

  • Omg you must be right o:

  • Wow, that guy about summed it up.

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